Here we are once again at the intersection of internet distress and how to distract Owen. Why, oh why can’t the internet act properly all the time. Or at least when we are home. Okay, so I know the answer to that question but Owen doesn’t. He slept all night, I finally fell asleep late only to wake up a dozen times reliving the last few days. Some days I’m more aware of autism in our lives and what it means. I am constantly having to make sure Owen is aware of his surroundings. He gets distracted easily and when he is on stairs he doesn’t always pay attention to where he is at. I have him count the steps with me and try to explain what’s around him, hoping that will help him become more aware. Owen’s request for church rang out loud and early. As many emotions as I have he holds on to them and I have to remember to keep moving forward and not let them control the situation. Easier said than done. I’ve cried all day. The stress of the past week has caught up to me. Not all the tears I cry are about Owen. Life seems to keep showing up when I least expect it. The woah is me attitude can’t be happening and I gotta suck it up I tell myself. And then I sit and cry. All the experts tell you it’s not good to hold in the emotions. I wonder what the experts say about letting them all out. I truly do not believe I have any more salt left in my body to produce a good tear but then I cry again. So I concentrate on Owen’s smile and how good he is doing. He’s been making huge steps and incredible progress. There’s a beauty in how he sees the world and how everyone plays their role in helping him grow. I’m thankful for where we are today and growing Owen is what we do. Even through rain, the sun will shine. There is beauty in every day if we choose to see it even through the tears that fall. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.