At some point, my emotions switched from happy and you know it to trying to put all the pieces back together. Owen does not always listen. I know he can’t process some of what I say to him as well. I always have to decide if it is the eight-year-old, autism, or Owen that is struggling in a moment. Most of the day seemed to cruise right along without any glitches. And then it was like something switched and everything seemed impossible. I have to remind myself that I got a washable area rug and a couch cover for a reason. It’s going to be fine I told myself numerous times today. When I see Owen running to the bathroom I have to hold it together. He isn’t running because he has to go, but because he already went. We’ve come so far on potty training and most days he does well with it, but why, oh why can’t it be every day. We had so many great moments today, that’s what I need to focus on. We sang Old MacDonald together while he played his guitar. It still makes me smile thinking about it. I’m amazed how he can make the guitar sound even though he doesn’t completely understand about how the actual notes work or how to hold his hands. I help position his hands around the neck of the guitar and make sure he strums over the opening of the guitar, but he is figuring it all out on his own on how to actually get the guitar to make the sound. It’s the same with the harmonica. The “whistle”, as he calls it, seems to be so easy for him to make the sounds. It’s not an easy instrument to play, yet he makes it look easy. He still doesn’t understand how to make a melody, but he never stops amazing me at how well he can actually get the notes out. It also makes me smile thinking about him playing the harmonica. That pushes more of my blues away. He fell asleep quickly tonight and it always seems to take me hours to find rest. Remember even in a storm you deserve happiness. Some days are hard. Some days are harder, but you are never alone. Remember to be kind to your soul. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.