I’m tired. So much progress still leaves me tired at the end of the day. And I’m wishing I had a pile of those cookies Owen and I made the other day but that cookie dreamboat already sailed the seas. I truly need to put sweets out of my mind again but one layer of stress on top of another layer of stress got me sitting in donut pajamas thinking about cookies, cakes, and all the donuts. Owen had a semi-okay day. Some moments better than others and some made me want to cry. In general, he handles rain better than me. In fact, he states, “I love puddles” anytime he sees water and it’s quite the declaration for many reasons. He often talks in the third person and his love for puddles is an understatement. He will seek them out to walk through them. But this morning he had no love for the rain that was going into the drains near the bus stop. He started yelling about them being vacuum cleaners and taking the water to the ambulance up in the sky. I want to hold back the tears but I can’t. In all of his words were emotions that I couldn’t help him connect. I knew it was hard on him because he didn’t even want to keep walking to the bus stop. Luckily a car turned the corner where his bus comes from and it was the little bit of distraction we needed. It broke the moment up for Owen and we were able to cross the street. This is why his words and connections are so important. I hear more rain as I write these words. It makes my tears fall harder. I made lasagna today and I wanted Owen to open the refrigerator door so I could put the leftovers in the refrigerator. I could have opened it but I am working with him on taking instructions and following through. I asked him to come open the refrigerator door. He first went to our front door. When I told him to come back to the kitchen he ran to the refrigerator but then he had to make sure “no shock today”. He is worried about static electricity and being shocked. We both are super magnets it seems and shock each other all the time. Plus he randomly will shock things. I showed him how to touch the wall and then something else, hoping this would help ease his anxiety about it. He touched the wall, then went to the cabinet not connected to the wall, and then opened the refrigerator not connected to the cabinet, but he opened it and ran off. I put the pan down after the five minute de-shock event. He did it though. He opened the door. I have to focus on the amazing progress he’s had this week. And that bright smile that brings me so much joy. At this moment next year I know I’ll look back and say look how far you’ve come. I bet he’ll be getting his own snacks right out of that refrigerator. Focus on the days ahead and make them the best yet. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.