One emotion after another kept pouring into me. Owen woke very early but fell back asleep for a few hours. Me, I don’t know that I slept at all last night. The demands came early from him. “Sit”, he said, before I had a chance to even completely get up from my seat. I was going to get the coffee I so desperately needed but he wanted the comfort of me next to him. The emotions, all the emotions shift through my body tirelessly like a weighted ballon trying to get off the ground. I try so hard to make connections to emotions and circumstances for him but my emotions can send him into his own little tailspin. So I breathe. His growth is huge and I know the day will come. He has been in sensory overload all day. Every single thing I’ve done today has caused screams or meltdowns so I sit. I walked into his bedroom to put something away. The minute I walked in there he came running around the corner and turned off the light, as he screamed for me to stop and once again wanting me to sit. The lights were too bright, the sounds were too loud until they weren’t loud enough, and he wanted to be pushed up against me as much as possible. I can only imagine how the world is amplified to him. I tried not to be emotional today but emotional is exactly what I was. He threw himself to the ground, flailing and screaming throughout the day. Washing my hands was one of the biggest challenges for the day but he washed his hands and dried them better than I’ve ever seen him dry them before without one scream. I hold on to the hope of tomorrow. I try to stay strong for him even though I crumble more times than I can count. I see growth though and his future will be amazing because every day he grows. Never stop believing in the hope for tomorrow. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.