When I breathe some days I don’t feel like I get enough air in my lungs to keep from crying. I train and retrain myself on how to deal with my daily moments of life. Owen was in sensory overload all morning. He needed me to sit and get in the same sentence. “Sit”, he yelled and without missing a beat, “veggie straw” came next. I tried to explain I can’t sit and get veggie straws at the same time. He yelled it again. He talked all morning about church but as soon as I wanted to get ready he wanted to sit on my lap. Sometimes when he crawls in my lap I wonder what he is thinking. Many times he needs sensory input and he wants me to rub his feet and do compressions on his joints. I get a little lump in my throat knowing that it took a long time for him to be able to give me the hints this is what he needed. Now he puts his feet in my hands and he says, “dis little piggy” from the nursery rhyme. The connection helped us both. I always wonder if he has fears or if he even understands fear. I know he isn’t scared of anything because he doesn’t understand something that could hurt him. Another lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. I think how do you teach someone to be more aware of their surroundings and that you have to be careful on stairs or squatting on top of the dinner table. One of the greatest parts of my day was hearing him harmonize with one of the characters he likes singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. When he sings in his natural voice he has an amazing pitch and tone. He doesn’t realize how well he sings. He loves singing and playing his instruments. He always wants to see the stage at church and I always tell him that he’ll be on that stage one day singing his heart out when he is ready. I want him to know if he believes in himself he can do anything he sets his mind to. Believe in yourself and dream the big dream. You can make it happen. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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