Happiness starts with sleep, I’m convinced. Owen slept last night. He probably would have slept a little later even if I didn’t have to go to the bathroom. Every noise is a noise but at least he slept all night. We both needed it. I told him last night that when he woke up this morning he was not going to have his tablet. His behaviors yesterday were not good and I wanted him to understand that he cannot act that way. He really doesn’t make the connections to having things taken away for behavior but I’m trying to make him understand that his actions matter. I tell him all the time that he gets to be in charge of his destiny and that how we treat others is important. We had a really good morning before he went to school but I had to keep him entertained every minute before we got ready to go to the bus stop. He helped put his clothes on and mostly did his shoes and socks. I had to turn his socks a little to get them straight for him. I sent the book that we’ve been reading to school with him so he could read it to his teacher. I can’t wait to hear how it goes this week. When he came home from school he was very calm. He took his jacket, safety belt, and shoes off without screaming or running away. He put everything up for me and then even answered my questions about what he did at school. He said he had “pizza” for breakfast, “popcorn” for lunch, and “waffles” for snack and he “ran with his friends”. Thankful that the school break wasn’t anymore days. Breaks are so hard on him. He waited until I told him he could have his tablet and then we ate a snack. He went to watch tv and I put his ukulele on the couch. I try not to push music on him but I still want him to participate and practice with the different instruments. When he sings with his natural voice he has perfect pitch. I asked him to play his ukulele for me and at first, he said no and then he played Old MacDonald Had A Farm. I asked him if he would play his harmonica. He did it but he wanted to go right back to playing his ukulele. He is so amazing with the harmonica though. He’s a natural with it and I can see how much he has improved but it’s not his favorite. With time I think he will start to like it more. When I was fixing our dinner I asked him to count to ten with his fingers. We’ve been working on this a lot more lately but today was years in the making. It still brings tears to my eyes as I watched him put each finger up going all the way to ten. He doesn’t completely understand the thumb still needs to be part of the counting but he has his whole hand up and then does the other hand. I started crying and he said, “happy”. I told him these were tears of joy. Throughout the rest of the evening, I asked him if he would count for me again and again and again. Each time a tear would fall. The joy from this one moment took years for him to do. I even had someone tell me he would probably never do it but I didn’t believe it, I couldn’t believe it. He’s a miracle and you don’t give up on a miracle, you never give up on a miracle. Yesterday was hard, harder than hard, but today we moved forward. There’s a light that shines through each of us and today Owen’s light shined bright. As he was falling asleep he held his thumbs together with all of his fingers up and he said “it’s a deer”. I realized that he learned it from one of the episodes of the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse that he asked to watch as he was falling asleep. Never give up on the hope for tomorrow. Your dreams are worth it. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.