Sleep is a figment of my imagination at this point but at least Owen has been sleeping better. My quiet-as-a-mouse trick has done great. Hard to believe sometimes I can be quiet enough but thankfully it has been fine. He slept until almost six so I’ll take it.
He woke up with his mission of school and home. He had said he wanted to go fishing but I knew that probably wouldn’t happen. His laughter echoing through the house is exactly what my heart needs. I love it when he is happy. He was mostly calm but wanted me to stay in the white bed while he ran around playing on his tablet.
We got dressed and out to wait for the bus we went. He was very calm but he was watching every corner to see where the bus was going to turn. He saw it heading our way and he started getting very excited. He stood next to me yelling his teacher’s name before he got on the bus. I wish I knew how to get him to understand he knows the answer. Sometimes I feel like it is about the conversation and sometimes I think it is his need for conformation.
His bus was running a little late because of mechanical issues. My doctor called during that time to tell me about the MRI. I’m always one of those medical mysteries and I’m thankful that my doctor understands this. She told me that she got together with the whole team to go over all my results. This made me happy to know they were all consulting on it. They decided I would start chemotherapy first and then evaluate more after. They will be calling me soon to see when I begin. I will be happy to get the process started.
When I woke up this morning I decided to go get my haircut. I was thankful I could get it. I wanted to take some of it and try to embrace all the changes with Owen. When he got home he got off the bus and he didn’t look at me but after the bus left he gave me a big hug. He didn’t scream. That was a good sign.
We went inside and I fixed his snack. He reached up to my hair and I asked him if he liked it. he looked at me and said, “No” and moved right on to talking about seeing his teacher tomorrow. The key is still no screams.
When we were painting together I started talking to him about having cancer. I told him mommy was sick and he said I had to go to the doctor to get medicine. He quickly offered his doctor right on up and told me we would take the elevator. I told him mommy was going to a different doctor. He said to make sure I take the elevator and the medicine will make me better. I am so thankful for these connections. These small dots will lead to bigger pathways and I know he will understand.
I asked him again later if he liked my hair but this time he looked at it when he said no. He moved on quickly to what days he had left to go to school. He was very calm all night and went to bed pretty easily. I’m thankful for that. I pray for sleep for both of us tonight.
The journey through life is constantly changing. I pray for understanding of each day forward for both of us. I continue to talk to him about how we have to give each other kindness and grace and together we can get through it all. We all got something and we are not alone in this journey. Be brave in facing the tomorrows yet to come and you will never be alone. Smiles to all and donut daze!
He woke up with his mission of school and home. He had said he wanted to go fishing but I knew that probably wouldn’t happen. His laughter echoing through the house is exactly what my heart needs. I love it when he is happy. He was mostly calm but wanted me to stay in the white bed while he ran around playing on his tablet.
We got dressed and out to wait for the bus we went. He was very calm but he was watching every corner to see where the bus was going to turn. He saw it heading our way and he started getting very excited. He stood next to me yelling his teacher’s name before he got on the bus. I wish I knew how to get him to understand he knows the answer. Sometimes I feel like it is about the conversation and sometimes I think it is his need for conformation.
His bus was running a little late because of mechanical issues. My doctor called during that time to tell me about the MRI. I’m always one of those medical mysteries and I’m thankful that my doctor understands this. She told me that she got together with the whole team to go over all my results. This made me happy to know they were all consulting on it. They decided I would start chemotherapy first and then evaluate more after. They will be calling me soon to see when I begin. I will be happy to get the process started.
When I woke up this morning I decided to go get my haircut. I was thankful I could get it. I wanted to take some of it and try to embrace all the changes with Owen. When he got home he got off the bus and he didn’t look at me but after the bus left he gave me a big hug. He didn’t scream. That was a good sign.
We went inside and I fixed his snack. He reached up to my hair and I asked him if he liked it. he looked at me and said, “No” and moved right on to talking about seeing his teacher tomorrow. The key is still no screams.
When we were painting together I started talking to him about having cancer. I told him mommy was sick and he said I had to go to the doctor to get medicine. He quickly offered his doctor right on up and told me we would take the elevator. I told him mommy was going to a different doctor. He said to make sure I take the elevator and the medicine will make me better. I am so thankful for these connections. These small dots will lead to bigger pathways and I know he will understand.
I asked him again later if he liked my hair but this time he looked at it when he said no. He moved on quickly to what days he had left to go to school. He was very calm all night and went to bed pretty easily. I’m thankful for that. I pray for sleep for both of us tonight.
The journey through life is constantly changing. I pray for understanding of each day forward for both of us. I continue to talk to him about how we have to give each other kindness and grace and together we can get through it all. We all got something and we are not alone in this journey. Be brave in facing the tomorrows yet to come and you will never be alone. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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