The screams are bound to come so I stayed in bed as long as I could. Owen woke in the night, came running to me, but he fell along the way. I got to him as quick as I could and held him. I think it shocked him more than anything. He asked to get in bed. He was asleep immediately. He runs all the time through the house. How do I get him to stop and how do I come up with all the answers. He sees no danger in anything he does. And the more I try to correct him the more he finds humor in it or goes full throttle into the wind. His newest thing is to run from the bathroom after he has finished his bath. While he’s in the tub he becomes a turbojet engine, kicking the water as hard as he can to create bubbles and spray the water everywhere. Why aren't bathrooms waterproof. Now I have to hold on to him so he doesn’t take off running when I get him out of the tub that he wants to jump from as he gets out. Why do bathrooms have hard surfaces. Today I’m feeling very alone. Trying to talk to Owen, work on projects with him, and teach him life skills, makes me feel like I’m lightyears behind. Some days I want the calm, when there’s always a storm brewing. He’s come so far and he’s doing amazing things, but I’m stressed. At four in the morning when your child is running to you and falls, you react. I have been reliving that moment all day because it’s one more night he hasn’t slept. What wakes him, what do I need to do differently, and how can I create my own calm in a world of chaos. Ya breathe Lynn, ya breathe. That’s how you do it. I look at him and his smile stops the cascading waterfall of emotions. That’s what I have to focus on. That’s what I have to use as my guide to strength. And that’s what gets me through my days. Today and always, remember you are not alone. Through the winter of life, spring will come. Make today matter. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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