Owen slept all night but woke extremely sleepy. Me, I didn’t sleep most of the night and I’m always sleepy. He was excited to go back to school after a snow day and I knew that it would help him to go. I also know that sometimes when he comes home from school I get that attitude he couldn’t unleash during school. He was full of words and actions, some good and some a little loud. Okay, so really loud. He screamed a lot and I tried not to cry. We are working on behavioral issues. I remind him we are a team and we don’t scream at each other, especially an inch from my nose. I feel it’s important to teach him about respect and working together. He may not understand it all but he is getting there. When he got off the bus, he said, “I rode the bus home”. There were his glorious words and he formed his own sentence. I tell him to use his words because he will use a lot of sounds. They aren’t all screams but he gets frustrated when I don’t understand him so I will sometimes fill in both sides of the conversation to help him with words and the structure of sentences. On today’s edition of why correcting Owen is a delicate balance of give and take you will see why the chicken crossed the table. He stuffed half his chicken patty in his mouth piece by piece, really quickly because I told him not to stick the chicken up his nose. He then made more noises, laughing hysterically, taking one piece at a time out of his mouth throwing them around. So how do you patiently explain and or ignore chicken flying around the room. But then there it was the happy connection for the day. I said, “I am so glad” and before I could finish he said, “you happy today”. He realized that glad meant happy. I was going to tell him that I was glad he enjoyed his chicken but his explanation worked better. Find what makes you happy, rejoice in the moment, and know that you are amazing. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I wish snow could pencil itself in for the weekends. What a day. When routine is off because of snow that’s a hard one to explain to Owen. He needed all types of input throughout the day and he ran through all the emotions one could have. Me, I tried to keep it together. Correcting Owen is like asking for the behavior to get a thousand times worse. I can’t show any signs of wishy-washy wondering because he reads me like a book and then you get what happened today. He’s fascinated with my hair. And I’m un-fascinated with him liking my hair. I asked him not to pull it and I also asked him not to get an inch away from my nose screaming. Had I ignored the behaviors they would have gone away quicker but instead, they all intensified and then the spitting and licking happened. I lost count of how many times I said, “don’t lick me”. He would walk up to me and lick my arm, walking away laughing. He’s gone through this phase before but it’s been a really long time. He wanted to vacuum but he wanted to scream about it. He got the handheld vacuum out and started moving it over the floors. Then he gave it to me. He got it out, he turned it on, and then he screams, “it will be off in a minute” until I turn it off and what comes next you ask, he screams, “turn it on no you do it turn it on”. I gave it to him and told him I had to finish making dinner. He pushed it for a couple of minutes and then dropped it. The trapdoor that keeps all the particles in flew open spilling its contents all over the floor. He immediately wanted it back in the container and tried to pick up all the little specks of dirt. Well, we had to vacuum again and I had to convince him to sit while I did it so we wouldn’t have carpet snow angels in the dirt. When I finished he wanted nothing to do with the dinner he requested but instead emptied his music basket that holds his instruments so that he could sit in it. We ended our day with a two hour not-so-fast fall asleep fest but I can tell how much he is working through emotions. He saw the happy and sad emojis earlier and he told me, “I’m happy today” pointing to the smiling one. Rejoice in your moments of victories and let them carry you to your joy. Smiles to all and donut daze!
My child was hyper today. Hyper probably doesn’t say enough about it. What’s the next word up from hyper, that’s what he was. He also is learning to assert himself. When he doesn’t want to do something he won’t. And it’s not a matter of saying Owen you are eating dinner or taking a bath it’s the fact that if it is presented in a particular manner he will meltdown or scream. And that’s not always how it works, most days he listens better and doesn’t have huge meltdowns but it’s also unpredictable. Tonight he was screaming on the floor because I accidentally hit his toy box and it made it angle sideways. He spent thirty minutes trying to correct the direction of it. And it probably would have been another thirty minutes if I didn’t distract him. Sometimes, most times, distracting him only makes him move on for the time I’m distracting him. As soon as I stop he will go right back to the emotions he has to work through or getting the furniture just so. He was squatting on his wobble chair with his feet. I told him he needed to sit on it. Instead of moving, he said, “don’t worry”. As much as I want him to do as he’s told I also listen to his growth in the words he says. His reply was unexpected and delightful all in the same moment that I really wanted him to sit and be careful. He likes to stand on his wobbly chair, stand on it. I know how well he and I both stand on flat ground, add in a wobble and I want my dude to sit. He fell asleep in mid-scream, woke up numerous times, and finally fell asleep for the night, hopefully. Today I’m thankful for the tomorrows yet to come. I can’t wait to see what they bring. Dream big, dream often, and watch your world grow. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I tried really hard to forget about the huge meltdown Owen had over the sun visor in the car and instead focus on the amazing progress he had. I pulled down the visor, not even thinking about it to block the sun. He immediately started screaming. Thinking through it I’m amazed at how much car knowledge he actually knows. He watches bus repair videos but I really didn’t understand how much he retained of them or was able to associate with the car connection. As soon as my visor was down he went into overdrive mode. He was saying all car-related words but he didn’t know how to talk to me about the visor. I immediately started crying but his words were amazing. He talked about the tires needing to be changed because of a flat, the engine, the windshield, and then it dawned on me that I had put the visor down. As soon as I popped it back up he stopped screaming. Everything has to be in its place and I needed to put it back. The next ten minutes of the drive were challenging and emotional. You would think I’d be used to meltdowns by now but I’m not. I had to push through those moments and concentrate on the fact that my baby crossed his fingers today, multiple times. This was huge. Truly the highlight of my day. To watch him do it was absolutely amazing. And then to ask him to do it and he did it was breathtaking. He always wants to start sentences but have me finish them. “That’s a”, he said and pointed to a dog on the screen. The thing is he was watching the 101 Dalmatians. He kept pointing to the different dogs. I could see this was going to take a while. I gave him a cup of milk to distract him. By the time I walked to the refrigerator to put the milk away he drank it all. But I didn’t know this. As I was walking back to him he turned his cup over. I thought milk was going to be everywhere. Instead, it was a few drops and multiple quick requests for milk. I read a new book with him that we just got. As soon as we were done reading it he looked it up on YouTube so he could hear the song that goes with it. And that was amazing. Through emotions, we grow and today we grew big. Find your motivation and inspiration and watch your world grow. Smiles to all and donut daze!
There was nothing fast about our morning. Owen was going to spend a few hours with his grandma today but we couldn’t get moving. He was excited to go, he wanted to go but he couldn’t process actually getting ready to go. Some days are like that. He was happy all morning but he needed to do his routine, go through his steps, and work through it on his time. We didn’t have anything we had to do so I would rather keep him calm and let him go at his pace when we can than push the envelope and have him upset. It truly doesn’t help the process if he goes into meltdown mode. His words and connections were plentiful this morning. He said, “no shirt in your mouth” as he put his shirt in and out of his mouth. We are working on ways to meet his sensory needs without chewing through all his shirts. It is helping and the words are forming. He walked around our house correcting all the furniture he thought was not lined up in the right spaces. He kept watching a video that says it’s the month of April and he walked up to me telling me it’s November. That felt huge. He told me all the days of the week and the months. He asked for apple juice instead of milk with his meal. That in itself might be the biggest step of all for our day. He finally helped me get him ready to go to see his grandma and I rejoice the progress he had so early in the day. Be thankful for the little things because usually, they lead to the biggest of steps. Smiles to all and donut daze!
Owen was extremely animated and full of words and expressions. This morning I told him I was cranky. He said, “no cranky today”. I said, I’m sorry but I am cranky. He quickly replied, “are you happy today”. Well, I guess my attitude needed to change. We had an afternoon snack of sweet potatoes. One of us liked it better than the other but at least one of us had three bites before declaring, “do you like it no”. I think he may not have been hungry because he wouldn’t have eaten that much if he hated it. Food is quickly becoming a source of my entertainment with Owen. I can’t believe how much he is eating, how often, and what he is eating. I made our dinner and told him to come to the table. He said, “I’m not going to eat now”. He pretty much stuck to his word. He loves goulash so I thought he would quickly join me. He wanted nothing to do with it until an hour later when he devoured it. And my onion rings. He ate onion rings the other day and he loved them so I figured he would want some. I asked him if he wanted some of my “onion rings”. He said, “no”. I sat down and he came to get a “sip of milk”. He then took one of my onion rings off my plate and proceeded to eat almost half of them. I think he didn’t know the term onion ring but I bet he will know it now. As we stepped through our day I thought about how he is always stepping on my feet and has no concept that it could hurt me. He doesn’t always see the world around him or understand what can hurt him, as well. I saw more connections to these moments today. Instead of using his name at first he would use one of the characters he watches and telling them to “be careful” and then he would say, “watch out” but he’s getting it. As he was drifting off to sleep he started talking about a song he sings at school and told me he was “going on a bear hunk”. He then quickly fell asleep. I may have woke up cranky but I’m going to sleep joyful. Find your joy and sing until your heart is happy. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I’m thankful but I’m tired. Holidays are hard, breaks in our routine are hard, this is hard. Every night when Owen goes to sleep he asks how many sleeps until he sees his teacher again. He’s been pretty calm through the week until today. We’ve gone nowhere because that throws off his week even more but today we went to my parents for brunch. Generally, when he is at my parents I am not. It’s his time with them. So me being there threw off the day. And then eating in the wrong room did not completely go over well either. He pretty much ate as quickly as he could, announced “you done”, and there was pretty much no turning back at that point. Add in all the meltdowns once we got home and that pretty much is how all our holidays go. It’s too much overstimulation and that’s going to a place he knows and loves. Routine is everything to him and this was hard. He was eating his dinner tonight and he wouldn’t sit down, running through the house with pasta flying everywhere. I asked him to sit and I asked him to use his spoon or his fork, I truly didn’t care which one. But that was too hard for him to process or handle today. He needed the sensory input of rubbing it all over his face, his hair, and especially up his nose. This momma had to breathe. He saw me getting upset, he had pretty much been screaming at me or the world all day. He walked up to me and said, “are you happy today”, as he could see the tears forming in my eyes. He has a way of snapping me back into reality. My boy, my heart, my world. I’m thankful on this Thanksgiving day for all that he has taught me. He’s growing and I know tomorrow is a brand new day. Find your strength, push forward, and make today matter. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I’m liking these sleeping nights. Owen has been falling asleep anywhere from nine to eleven and waking between four and six in the morning. I’ll take it. For him to be sleeping through the night is wonderful. I’ve watched him make so many connections and express more emotions lately. I poured his milk in his glass this morning and he said, “chocolate milk”. He went on to tell me it was brown and “manilla milk is white”. “I drink chocolate milk”, he said, stating it like it was the preference he meant it to be. This felt great to me. All the steps and words to get through those moments are coming together. He goes through stages where my hair is more of an obsession to him. It has to be exactly just so. Mommy has to be picture perfect and if I try to move my hair he will immediately go into meltdown mode. Me even pulling it back in my hands will have him screaming or on the floor. I am constantly feeling like I’m being judged by my eight year old but I have to remind myself that is not what it’s about at all. He hasn’t seen my hair fully wet in years. I tried to slowly introduce it to him by showing him a section of my hair wet at a time but after a week of me increasing the amount of my hair being wet, I put it on hold. The meltdowns were huge and the hours it took for him to process it was just too much on me, and him. Mentally and physically I was exhausted from his outbursts about my hair. We will revisit it one day but I’m not ready for it. I got him some new bath toys and his pure joy made me realize I was going to have to get him more. He wants nothing to do with toys until he is in the bath. “Shark shark s is for shark it’s a fish”, he sang out as he used his new shark toy to chomp on the little fish it came with. He counted the fish as he threw them in the water. He sang songs and made up words too. I’m thankful for his growth but more importantly I’m thankful for the smile that he gives me. I tell him all the time that when he smiles it changes the world to a better place. Find your inspiration, be motivated, and make your dreams come true. Smiles to all and donut daze!
Owen is learning emotions. He was crying. Maybe he was working through why he isn’t in school, maybe he was working on the emotion of crying. All I know is I wanted to cry with him. He couldn’t tell me why he was crying but one day I know he will be able to. He’s been pretty mellow all day. I love how he is starting to make the connection to what his body can do. He was watching a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse video and they were dancing. I asked him to dance for me and he did. He got up from the couch and he tried to do the moves like Mickey and the gang was doing. My heart rejoiced. Now, this boy is making sure his belly is full all day, every day. I’m so excited about all the new things he is trying and the amount of food he has been eating. He had waffles and cereal for breakfast. Then he had yogurt. For lunch, he ate a cheeseburger. He doesn’t really eat beef so for him to eat a cheeseburger was a huge step and made this momma smile. Numerous snacks before dinner and numerous snacks after dinner, after the huge dinner I should say. I made three chicken patties with gravy and onion rings. He ate almost all of the onion rings, I only had a couple and he ate almost two of the chicken patties. I gladly stopped eating when I saw he was passing me up to give him the second patty and the rest of my onion rings. He ate it all but one last bite of the chicken patty. He might have finished it if he didn’t run off to go potty and then get distracted when he was done. I’m thrilled he is willing to try so many new things. He’s growing and learning. Today as time stood still I saw my baby still moving forward. I’m thrilled for his growth and can’t wait to see what tomorrow holds. Find your strength, share your story, and smile for the world to see. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I was sitting on the couch with coffee in hand when Owen woke up. He came and sat on my lap. I love mornings like this. He was so calm. He rested his hand on my face numerous times and I was thankful. After about thirty minutes, which was a very long time for him, he started moving and almost getting up. I said, “you have to go potty” and instead of saying, “yes ma’am no ma’am” like he always does, he said, “in a minute”. With many of our conversations I can predict the next line he is going to say so when he says something different it’s very exciting to me. He was very animated as the day went on but everything thing had its place and had to be just so. Doors, drawers, and ducks must be in a row or at least closed or open. It’s the rules. And it depends on which door or drawer it is whether it needs to be open or shut. He spilled his milk. This usually gets big squeals, instead, he said, “oh man”. This again felt huge to me, no screams for something that normally gets big screams. He tripped over something and he said, “be careful” and followed it quickly with “are you ok”. My go-to phrases quickly coming out of his mouth now when he does something that could hurt himself. He wore an orange shirt with deer on it. I will ask him what color he is wearing or what he has on his clothes. Generally, he will tell me the color of his shirt but he won’t tell me what character or design is on his clothes. I asked him what color his shirt was and he quickly told me orange. Then I asked him what was on his shirt he repeated orange and then said, “grey”. I took him to stand in front of the mirror and I asked him again what was on his shirt, he told me, “grey deer”. I wanted to dance. As the day closed he came to me for a kiss on his forehead and then he gave me one too. Through moments of change, we both grow. Follow your heart, share your smile, and make your dreams come true. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.