Sometimes I’m not prepared for autism. Owen has been doing so good about going places, I forget sometimes how hard it is for him to go places. When I picked him up from school he asked to go to all his favorite places. I told him we were going to see different fish today, and that we were going to a different restaurant. “Nopeidy nope”, was immediately spoken. I kept driving. He asked for the fish. I took him to the pet store, instead of going to Cabela’s to see the big fish tank. I thought he might like seeing some of the other animals, as well. He looked at the fish for a couple minutes, but then he saw a large step ladder, that he thought was a swing. It had a chain across the front of it, to detour customers from using it. I walked him to another area, hoping to distract him from the “swinga”. We walked near the birds, and reptiles. He showed little interest in the birds, but quickly wanted to go back to the swing. We walked by the fish again, but he only had eyes for the “swinga”. We left without much fanfare. He asked for the fish, knowing he might the big tank. I told him we would go another day. I wanted to take him to a different restaurant, but that didn’t go as planned. We pulled up to the restaurant, I got out of the car, and I tried to get Owen out. The crocodile tears came immediately, he pushed his feet on the seat in front of him, and he attempted to buckle himself back in. Joy, then sadness sat there in my heart. My baby was trying to buckle himself back into his seat, but the reality of this all being too overwhelming for him sunk in. I pushed forward. I knew we should go home, but I knew we needed to go to the restaurant more; for both of us. Off to Bob Evans we went. We got there, and he wasn’t convinced we needed to go, but he also didn’t want to go home. We stood in the parking lot. I asked him if he wanted food, or he wanted to go home. He walked towards the restaurant. It wasn’t probably one of our top performances in a restaurant, but it certainly wasn’t our worst. We had a very nice waitress, that related to us, and got our order to us quickly. We made it. That’s what I kept telling myself. Today I pushed us. I’m not sure if it was the right decision, but tonight Owen’s happy, and I’m not crying, so there’s success in there somewhere. Never give up. Today may seem like a valley, but know that tomorrow you can climb the mountain to success. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.