When will the sleep come again, I think. It seems like it has been an eternity since Owen slept through the night. At least last night when he got into bed with me he hardly moved, he didn’t try to pull my hair, or anything. He woke relatively happy, but the screaming, the screaming is intense. He screamed, because I turned the light on. And then within seconds the light was off and he was screaming about going to see his teacher. I told him that mommy needed the light on if he wanted to see his teacher, because we had to see to get ready. My immediate thought after I finished my words was summer is coming. My heart breaks in a million pieces, knowing routine will be disrupted. Oh, how I wish he could go to school year round. He loves school, he thrives in the routine of it all. I got him ready for school and he started screaming again. This is the “I’m the boss” scream, wanting his tablet. There are different tones that I can tell what is happening. Happy screams, meltdown screams, wanting me to give into his demands screams, attention getting screams, you name it screams, but they all sound different. I talked to him about screaming. I explained to him when he should do it and why he shouldn’t do it. And mommy needs a donut. One day at a time. When we were walking to the bus he was excited. He wanted to set the timer on my phone to “one minute timer go offT and den de bus comes”. The bus came around the corner a few minutes later and he lit up. The smile he gives for a ride on the bus takes away the moments of our morning. Keep pushing forward, I tell myself. He has matured in the last week it seems. I know he has gotten taller; pants that fit him last week are now short for him. This journey is ever changing and today is the beginning of our future. Enjoy the ride, sit under the clouds, and set your dreams in motion. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.