They say no crying over spilled milk. Well then I’m not crying over not going bowling. That’s what I’m telling myself. No coffee shop. No bowling. No store shopping. I may or may not take Owen to my parents for a few hours, but he is having such a calm morning I don’t want to upset the apple cart. I’m wearing shorts and have my hair pulled back. The shorts went over easier than the hair being pulled back. Summer to winter, winter to summer are hard transitions for him because clothes and looks matter to him. My appearance has to be mommy picture perfect, looking the same all the time, my hair still being the greatest concern for him. When I put on my shorts he did what he always does. He starts with some sensory sounds, then starts chewing on the corner of his tablet case, next he walks backwards in front of me until he finally reaches out to pull on the hem of my shorts wanting them to be longer, sometimes he’ll bend down stopping right in front of me. This year he isn’t screaming about my shorts as much so that’s progress. He still comes and pulls on them randomly throughout the day and almost on cue he yells, “pants on”. My hair being pulled back or my glasses being off cause him to go into meltdowns as well. I’m trying to work through mommy’s appearance with him so he knows it’s me no matter how I look. I explained to him that I was going to pull my hair back. I sat in front of him slowly pulling it behind my head to put up. He wanted my hair down and the elastic band out of my hand. I pushed forward. I got it pulled back with only a few screams and a handful of attempts to pull it out. Throughout the afternoon he has walked up to me checking on my hair and shorts to make sure they still are the same. I try not to upset Owen about my hair, but there are times I want it back out of my face. I never imagined how much my appearance would affect him. All I can do is try to help him with the process. We learn, we grow, we love. He’s asked to play music and paint today. We’ve looked at his schoolwork and we’ve sung a lot of songs. Let the busy work keep us busy and moving forward. My heart is with the world and I’m thankful Owen is by my side. Share your joys, celebrate your victories, and remember today is one moment in time. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.