Send up the flares Owen slept through the night. He woke a little before six and was very calm. He was even relatively quiet while my brain fought to catch up. He’s still planning for his week ahead and it feels good. He was ready to go to church but he was not ready to get dressed. He has started a new thing where he puts one leg in his pants but he will either walk around like this or pull them completely back off. It will take him five or six times to get to the point he keeps them on. His concern for what I was wearing and what he was wearing started about an hour before we were even getting ready. I am trying to get him to understand that we shouldn’t care about what someone is wearing but instead care about the person. I want him to think about his actions and reactions. I told him that we have to give our attention to someone’s heart, not to their clothing. I’m hoping that he will make the connection. I explained that I love him because he is amazing not because he is wearing certain clothes, trying to teach him that clothes do not make the person. I don’t have the answers but I pray that my words will at least impact him to try to refocus his blue pants energy. Before we left for church he had the rest of his juice and he dropped some on his shirt. I wiped it off with a wet rag. He was concerned that his shirt was wet. He ran to the bathroom and rubbed his towel near his shirt. He wasn’t close to the spot but it made him feel better that he was trying to dry it. I pushed forward. I told him it would dry with the air. Countless times this has kept us from leaving the house, having to change him before we could go. I told him we would be late if we didn’t go. I was trying to think of anything to get him out the door. When we got to church I showed Owen his shirt had dried. He was no longer concerned with it and didn’t even acknowledge my words or look down because he was focused on getting to his class. A calm washed over me sitting in church. I am only in control of my own actions and reactions. I have to remember this. The calm becomes chaotic as I let all the things, all the things come back into my vision but I know we can change like how his shirt dried. He has talked about going to the pool tomorrow with our friends. “I wear swimming suit,” he said. I said no one would be wearing blue pants. I went over this numerous times. As the day wore on he said multiple times he would wear his swimming suit. He wanted me to watch him play a video game so he told me “sit right here” motioning for me to sit on the chair near him. I love when he wants to do things with me. I was fixing his dinner and he said, “cut a string toenail.” This means his toenail is rough and he needs it filed or cut. I went to him and he was chewing on something. His dinner was not made yet. Let’s just say I still filed his toenail. He was watching a video and he said, “she has blue pants but we no talking bout blue pants we talking bout blue pants wear pedal pushers swimming suit” so I can tell he was thinking about it. His words and actions teach me how my words are interrupted by him. It is a learning process for me as much as it is for him. I’m thankful for everything he has taught me and what that has done for me. I am a better version of myself because of him. Embrace your own destiny and be the change you want to see in the world around you. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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