Sweet Baby O - Our Autism Journey
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Grow Monday - our autism journey

11/14/2023

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​Some days are emotional before they even begin. Being sick is hard on Owen. He was excited about going to the doctor's office so he could see his doctor, but he knew that meant he was missing everything else. As soon as we woke up he wanted to know when we were going to the doctor. I told him that I would call as soon as they were open and he kept telling me that they were open. It’s hard to explain to him that things aren’t always open twenty-four hours a day. The good news was he wanted breakfast. He asked for waffles and I made him four. He hasn’t lost his appetite the whole time he has been sick. He sat there, eating them and talking about going to the doctor. I told him that we would not know when we were going until I could actually make the appointment. He kept telling me to get ready and I told him that I had to take out the trash and then we would know when his appointment was. Thankfully, we were able to get him in for the afternoon. He was running a slight fever, and his nose was still very snotty. Once he found out what time his appointment was, he still kept asking me to get ready. I told him that we had to eat breakfast and lunch and then we would leave. He kept asking me if lunch was done. His doctor understands his concerns about blue pants. She tries to wear them when she knows he is coming, but since this was short notice, it was not for sure whether she would have on blue pants. He has been doing much better, but there are still many times when he can’t handle when someone’s not in blue pants. I tried to explain to him that he got to choose what pants he wanted to wear when we got dressed to go, but that’s still a very hard concept for him. It’s an emotional journey, watching your son struggle with something that you don’t have an answer to. When we got there unfortunately, she was not wearing blue pants. The intern that she had with her was so that did help some. Fortunately, this wasn’t as rough as some of the other times with blue pants, but it was still very emotional for both of us. I don’t always know how to handle situations when he is getting upset about something. He walked up to her and wanted to see her socks so he pulled up her pants to look at her leg. There are so many moments where I try to explain to Owen that we can’t touch other people, we can’t make them wear blue pants. We can’t make them do so many things. But that’s a hard concept for him to understand, for any of us to understand. I’m thankful for a doctor that completely gets my son. She has been with him since he was a baby. She calmly walked through all of the steps with us and Owen cooperated with having his ears, examined and opened his mouth so she could look at his throat. His fever has been minimal this whole time so she said, thankfully, there was no infection and he was cleared to go back to school as long as the fever did not increase. On the way home he wanted to stop by the burger boy. Usually he doesn’t want to get out of the car. Before we even left the doctor's office, he was talking about climbing the statue and getting out of the car. I told him that it wasn’t a building that we could climb, but he could still look at the statue. He was so excited to get out of the car and go up to the building. Once we got to the building he instead wanted to walk on the street down to his favorite school that he had never attended. The street was busy and not one that I wanted to walk on with him. He doesn’t always listen to instructions and wants to do what he wants to do. I told him we could not walk on the street and it just upset him. I explained again that the street was too busy and that we had to go home. He then stood by the building and kept telling me five more minutes. I told him we had to go so he said, “Set the timer for one more minute.” I set it for about twenty seconds and as soon as the timer went off, he headed straight for the car. I was thankful for this because I didn’t want to try to keep him out of the street. We got home and the rest of the night was a rollercoaster of emotions and I could tell he was super elevated about the days ahead. The repetitive behaviors cycle through and right now with his schedule being constantly changed this has been extremely hard on him. He kept talking about going to the library and wanting to walk with everyone he knew. Bedtime came and he went to bed but as soon as he laid there, he started yelling out about going to school and riding the bus. He wanted to make sure that he was going to see all his favorite people and then come home and stay for the rest of the night. I told him that we could do anything he wanted over the next few days and he said stay home. I told him that we could or we could go to the library. He finally calmed down and fell asleep. Days like today are very emotional but I still see the progress and know that he has grown tremendously. Hopefully, nothing changes and he will be able to go to school tomorrow. Every day is a valuable learning experience and even through the struggles we both grew today. Walk through your struggles and know your strength is there to see you through those days. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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    I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.

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