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Sometime Sunday

6/20/2021

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Owen woke at some point and came to me. I was too exhausted to even realize what time it was. He woke again after six, saying “church” and then back to sleep he went. He slept until almost eight at that point. I think he was completely exhausted from all the meltdowns and emotions. I know I sure was and still am. And here it is after eleven and he finally fell asleep from our day. He started asking to go to bed before seven. I decided last night to try to block his view in the car so it might be easier on him when we go places. I got online and knew I could have a delivery first thing in the morning before church. I ordered a set of window curtains like you would use in a camper and some black fabric that I thought I would clip in different sections to keep him in more of a cocoon. It kinda worked. He could move the curtain for the window next to him but he couldn’t see out the other windows. He was calmer at least for the ride to church. When we got there he was ready to go see his friends and “ride the elevator”. He generally has one mission, get to his class but today he stood there talking to one of the ladies from our church. “Hold my hand”, he said. She took his hand, speaking to him as she did it. He told her he was going on the “grey square elevator”. It felt great to see him interacting with her when my nerves were a ball of spaghetti from the trip there. I kept waiting for him to have another meltdown. As quickly as the conversation started he was ready to go to class. He had a great day they said and then it was time to head home. I dreaded the thought of it but we had to get home one way or another. I fixed the curtain he pulled down and then off we went. We got almost all the way home before he started screaming. It wasn’t as bad as the day before but the emotions were still there. I was able to calm him down but it still took a lot of effort and energy from both of us. Once we got inside our house he was able to remain calm for most of the day but my nerves were still all in high gear waiting for the screams to echo louder in my heart. Tomorrow I will try to get some dark film or something else for the window that he can take the screen off but otherwise, I’m going to keep trying this and see where it goes for him. He wanted an early bath, to play lots of music, and to go to bed. Four hours later he finally fell asleep. Hearing him sing about having a violin on the farm made me laugh and smile. I’m thankful music brings him joy and I’m proud of his incredible progress. Celebrate all your victories no matter how big or small they are. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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    I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.

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