Have you ever been in a room full of people and all you wanted to do is not be in a room full of people; that happens to Owen all the time. It doesn’t even have to be in a room. The open outdoors, a busy or non-busy store, and even our car can be overwhelming for him. So, how do I explain that he loves to go bowling every week, to a place that is often loud and busy. I can’t explain it, but I’m learning to embrace it and help him through these moments. Owen’s teacher called to tell me he was having a rough time at his field day, you know the day that is supposed to be fun for kids. As the moments wore on she said he was doing better but my heart aches for my baby. Should I have gotten him right that second. Do I need to put a bubble around him. How is this going to effect the rest of his day. The wonder and the questions go on. The biggest one, how do I keep from crying. This is difficult for my baby, this is difficult for me. You feel alone and isolated about everything. Nothing about change or something out of routine is easy for him. Or me. It doesn’t necessarily come at that moment either. It can be days later that Owen remembers a detail that upset him, sometimes it doesn’t even have to be something that upset him but something that was different. Once he gets that moment on his mind it can be hours of him coming to me repeating words that are referencing to that moment in time. One of the things I cry out to God for is a calm to wash over our lives. I sit thinking about the struggle my sweet baby O has had today, knowing that he will grow in this moment, so will I, but it’s still hard. Every day, as the rain falls, I think this is one moment in time. The sun will shine again. Find strength in knowing that tomorrow is a brand new day. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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