This glorious streak of sleeping is amazing. Owen slept until well after seven. He even slept through me going to the bathroom and getting coffee. He even slept through me checking on him because he slept through me going to the bathroom and getting coffee. He rarely sleeps through noise of any kind. To say he was tired last night is an understatement. I’m thankful he was able to sleep so soundly. When he woke he was still sleepy but listened to me when I said to go to the bathroom first before he sat down. He gave me a big hug and then went to the bathroom. I’m glad he was calm when he woke. He had a few things on his mind and he didn’t let me forget them all day. It was Friday and he was going to “be with mommy” and he talked about his therapist’s blue pants. He didn’t see her yesterday and she hardly wears blue pants. This might be why he wants to talk about them so much. His other two therapists wear them occasionally so maybe that’s why he doesn’t reference them. He wanted me to interact with him a lot throughout the day. He however only wanted to listen when he wanted to listen. I was in the middle of cooking our breakfast once again and he wanted me to “sit right here.” I told him that after we ate I would. He likes to have me sit while he watches videos. He finished before me because he didn’t eat the food he asked for. He was full of connections and excitement as the day went on. He was playing a game on his tablet and the character stands on a spot and like a little rocket blasted up into the sky. He said, “liftoff” after counting down to watch the little animal fly off the screen. He followed it up with “boo hoo” quoting the game because he won against the character and it was sad. He had Alexa and Siri competing to see who could translate quicker. And they both know that when he requests “buffalo in spinach” that they should say it in Spanish. He had a pretty good day but he was very adamant about staying home. I think he associates Fridays with us traveling to North Carolina. He wanted to make sure we were not going anywhere. He talked about wanting to ride the train but as soon as I said we could go he said, “no ride train today.” I told him it wouldn’t be until next week but he started screaming so I distracted him and asked him about his tablet. My expectations, the world’s expectations, and his expectations are not all the same. I try to not linger or sit in thought about my expectations of activities or things he might like to do but I continue to overthink the outcome of it all. I try not to even think about the world’s expectations, instead, I focus on making Owen happy and learning how I can make his expectations come true within the boundaries of keeping him safe, content, and growing. My emotions weigh heavy when his screams echo through our walls. Today most of his screams were happy screams except when our internet went in and out. Only a few more weeks and he will be back in school. I’m praying routine will set right back in for us and that will help him with some of the things he is struggling with. I’m thankful he is sleeping better and I pray tonight is one more night we can click off the list. It’s Friday though and he is already planning his Saturday with grandma. Be happy in your soul and know that you can make a difference in the world. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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