Two in the morning is that a late start or an early start to the day? All I know is I was exhausted. And still am. Two days in a row Owen has been up in the middle of the night. I told him he needed to go back to bed but that wasn’t an option that he was excited about. I reiterated several times but still, it didn’t change the coasts of the night. I didn’t put his tablet in its regular charging spot hoping this would also detour him from staying up. I told him again that he needed to go back to his bed if he wanted to go to Grandma’s house. He was not going back to bed and the screaming continued. He spent many hours off and on throughout the day lying in bed with me but no sleep for either of us. I told him that he was not going to go see his grandma today because we didn’t sleep so he then kept talking about sleep for tonight. Church was on his mind since he didn’t sleep last night. His upcoming break from school I think is causing him to wake up but it could be from many other factors as well. When he realized he wasn’t going to grandma’s house he quickly changed his attention to taking a bath. I told him that he could take it after dinner. As soon as he ate his lunch he started swimming in his “house pool.” I told him not until after dinner so then he requested his dinner early. I told him no but the screaming continued. I told him that he could take his bath but then he wouldn’t have his tablet afterward and instead, we would watch a movie. He took his “house pool” with his swimming suit and goggles on. It’s no longer called a bath at this point when he’s in the tub. Then we attempted to watch a movie. The movie screen came up and he said, “That earth.” In the first movie, we didn’t get very far. It didn’t hold his attention and he kept screaming for Curious George so we watched his choice of the Curious George Christmas movie but every two seconds he asked for the Halloween one. I made him watch the full Christmas movie but he asked continuously during it for the Halloween one. Once the Christmas one was done I looked for the Halloween one he wanted but it wasn’t available. He requested shrimp for dinner and sat eating it, saying, “Mmm that’s delicious going to church yes yes mommy going to church.” My answer is if he sleeps tonight. I’m praying he sleeps tonight. The days and nights are hard when he is so focused on what’s ahead. The screaming is what gets me. I try to distract him but in exhaustion it’s hard. I’m thankful for the calm moments we had and when he sat with me and we were able to talk. Each day I pray for a better tomorrow and finding the strength to come up with solutions that work for us both. Autism is as much about how I handle it as it is about Owen having. His laughter and hugs are what got me through the day. Find your strength, share your story, and know tomorrow is a brand new day. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.