It’s cold. It’s like winter is trying to win an award for the best representation of interpretive cold. Owen’s concern for the week ahead continued this morning before five, maybe it was four. He got his tablet and I sent him back to his room but he sat in the living room laughing and singing with the videos he was watching. Some time went by and he was at the table saying, “chocolate milk and cereal please.” I really wasn’t awake but I certainly wasn’t asleep either at this point. I got up and went to the bathroom and then fixed first breakfast. He asked about his teacher and then he asked about his teacher again and then he asked about his teacher again and then he asked about the bus and then he asked about his teacher. After asking for his teacher again he asked about church and then he asked about his teacher again. He also tells me that he is not going to see her again. I remind him of her words. She made sure to go through it with him before we left yesterday. She reminded him that she would see him on January 4th. We talked a lot about the date. My heart is all over the map today. I can’t stop thinking about my brother. This is the second Christmas without him. It isn’t easier than the first. What I want to remember is his giving heart. That’s what I’m going to focus on over the next few days. Owen has mentioned “uncle wichard” numerous times in the last few days. How do I ever explain something I don’t even understand myself? I pray a lot, a lot -a lot. It’s what gets me through the days. I watched Owen as he stood, listening to a song, holding his hands back to his ears, singing a completely different song than he is watching. He did this numerous times. He kind of does this dance with it where he pushes himself back from his tablet and then moves really close to it again. I walked into the kitchen and I told him I loved when I hear him singing. He said, “little red wagon.” I knew as soon as he said it that he was thinking about church and singing from the hymnals. His classroom will be open for the first service but I’m going to see if he wants to sit and watch the second service or at least a portion of it. Or at least that is the plan. Hopefully, the weather will cooperate with us. He mentioned singing at church again as he was falling asleep. I’m glad he likes to sing and he wants to do it at church. He was having a hard time processing it all but I’m thankful that he is making more connections to Christmas. I’m thankful for his new interest in Santa and that he loves going to church to learn about the reason we celebrate for the season. I pray he sleeps tonight and so do I. I’m thankful for his smile and his songs. Sing your songs from the rooftops and know that miracles happen every day. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.