We cling to the routine of what tumbles through our days. I know Owen’s world is so much calmer when his routine is in order and right now everything keeps changing for him. I know that I should prepare him for changes but that is easier said than done. It can take ten, twenty, one hundred times before something starts changing for him or until he understands an new objective. Sometimes quicker but in general it takes time. We both slept until about six. It felt glorious although I didn’t fall asleep until after one. He was ready for church but he wanted to know about his days ahead. He repeatedly asked me what he was going to be doing on Thursday and wanted to make sure that I was taking him to therapy. He also asked what day he was going to ride the bus who he was going to see and what days he was going to his doctor. It’s hard to explain that there aren’t always the same things going to happen each week but when it’s something he knows is repeatedly going to happen that makes it even harder. When we got to church, he started talking to me about the things while we were on the elevator. He said I had a “book of notes” and then went through all the people's legs we don’t touch. He wanted me to know that he wasn’t going to touch people's legs because they were wearing blue pants. He then told me all the people that weren’t wearing blue pants from the previous week. I have a feeling he could tell me who wasn’t wearing blue pants a year ago. He did great at church, and we came home with his chicken nuggets and cheeseburger in tow. He ate a lot all day long. At one point he asked me for chips and I said, “veggie straws or chips?” He said, “chips.” A few seconds later he said, “throw veggie straws in trash.” I was looking at the bike that I had ordered for him and it’s now arriving on Tuesday. He just happened to walk up right when I was looking at it and he saw it. He said, “sit bike sit on bike Tuesday” after I told him when it was going to arrive. He asked for fish tonight and when the buzzer went off he said, “the fish ready it gotta cool now it’s ready mommy fish ready.” I think he was hungry. I love these conversations and connections. Years ago when he would talk I would start jotting down all the things he said. I clung to each one of those words and they feel even more vibrant now. He got up a couple of times when it was bedtime. Part of the reason was the never ending light saga where he wants all the lights off in the house but he wants his bedroom light left on. I’m thankful for his progress and all the connections he’s making. Find hope in tomorrow, know that you can make a difference, and smile through it all. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.