Sweet Baby O - Our Autism Journey
Contact Me
  • Home
  • The Daily
  • Paintings
  • Products
  • Church
  • Down This Road
  • Book
  • Podcast

Flat Out Monday

5/4/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
I sat crying at my kitchen table. The day overwhelming once again. I try not to cry in front of Owen because it’s so hard for him to process and a lot of times it makes the situation worse, but there I was crying. He’s back to trying to eat my hair again. This makes me sad and I struggle with how to get him to stop. His anxiety seems to be really high the last few days and many of his behaviors are resurfacing, like trying to eat my hair. The more I try to have him do his schoolwork the more it brings out his emotions. He cried more times than I can count for the bus. He brought it up over and over and over again. I tried to explain to him that he would ride the bus again soon, that next year he would be going back to school, but would have a new teacher and a new routine. I wish I could find the right words so he wouldn’t feel like the world abandoned him. My emotions feel heavy as well. As I sat there crying I put my hands to my face. I needed to stop crying, but I wanted calm for my baby. As I pulled my hands away from my face Owen got out of his chair and took my hands, putting them back on my face. He stood next to me for several moments and every time I would try to move my hands off my face he would put them right back up there. He said, “I wuv ewe” and I started bawling even harder. I tell him I love him all the time. I want him to know how much he is loved. I often wonder if he understands the concept of certain emotions and words, but when he tells me he loves me, especially in my emotional moments I don’t have to question it at all. I try to help him understand his emotions and how they work in our world. I tell him all the time we are a team and together we will get through this. He sang a lot to me today, in between his questions about the school, his teacher, and the bus. I keep hoping that if we can get back to any of his other activities that it will at least give him some hope. He’s been playing a lot of his bowling apps and I tell him we will get to go back to it soon. He then asks to put his shoes on and I have to explain to him not yet. One day at a time I remind myself. And these one days feel long and hard. I want my baby to be happy and I want to do everything I can for him. Life is not always easy to explain, but the love sure is. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Smiles to all and donut daze!
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.

    Archives

    May 2025
    April 2025
    March 2025
    February 2025
    January 2025
    December 2024
    November 2024
    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    June 2024
    May 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    May 2017
    January 2016
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed