I can’t change yesterday but I can be bold in my tomorrows. I keep reminding myself to move forward. Sorrow will be there, joys will be there but the steps forward are where I have to be, where we will accomplish our dreams. We slept all night. Owen seemed like he was feeling a lot better. We sang all morning and he asked for pancakes then waffles then pancakes and back and forth for several more rounds and then he settled on pancakes. He laughed as he went back and forth like he was pulling a fast one over me. He ate most of them. The pure adrenaline rush of yesterday’s electricity being out for several hours was met with a calm attitude today once he understood that he was still getting to go to church. I think about this often. The places he wants to go are the places that fill his heart with gladness and he always wants to make sure he gets to go. He was vivid in all of his expressions today except when he was asking for food. It seems he is struggling with saying please and thank you. On the way to church, he told me he wanted an elephant to come to his party. He also asked for a tent and marshmallows. I think he is mixing all the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse episodes with everything else and coming up with what he wants to do. I try to give him real-life versions of what he watches but I’m not sure if I will be able to invite an elephant to his party. And I’m not even sure which party he is referring to. He had a great time at church and then the request for the tractor came in. He also wanted to go to the tents but I told him he would have to decide which one he wanted to do. I don’t want to keep it where we have to do all the same things each week because that can get hard. Next week I told him we were going to get something different for lunch but today we went and got his cheeseburger and nuggets. He told me that the “house flew the coop” in the section where they are putting the new road and they tore down all the houses. He is finally starting to calm down about the houses being gone. It’s a discussion that we go over numerous times as we pass the area. And even when we are not right there. He keeps having me hold his tablet and then he will take my finger and puts it on something to select it like he used to do. I’m not sure if this is connected to his visual processing or a need for input of some kind. He’s been cycling through so many different emotions and behaviors. Like breakfast and lunch, dinner was interesting. He ate the middle of his sandwich and left the crust. This felt good to me. Like a memory running through my mind of when I was a kid. My mom would cut my crust off for me. Owen has always loved bread so this was interesting for me. He is fully invested in this month. He asked for a Halloween bed and to have pumpkin soup. He however does not want to carve or cut up a pumpkin to make it or a jack-o-lantern. He fell asleep with parties on his mind and going to school tomorrow. I loved hearing him sing today and he’s working on his scales again all on his own with a big ole smile on his face and opening his mouth wide. It brings me joy. Give yourself time to walk in the expectations of tomorrow’s journey and let your own victory take place. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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