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Going Tuesday

7/12/2022

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I am trying to block out exactly the time that Owen got up but I know I kept asking him to go back to bed since about one in the morning. My childhood self can only relate to having so much energy after being up that long. I’m so passed exhausted my sheep are counting humans. I’m going to try to keep him up later tonight but that is not always easy. He starts requesting his blanket by about seven and anywhere from eight to nine it seems like he is out. I’ve also found that even when I do attempt to keep him up it doesn’t prevent him from waking up in the middle of the night. His body wakes up on its own schedule and that’s that. I can say the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree and I never slept as a child, never. With him being up so early he didn’t want any of the lights on and this caused a huge meltdown because I wanted the light on in my room. I never imagined all the moments I would have to navigate by five o’clock in the morning on a daily basis. He was stuck on blue pants again this morning. Every video that he watched and the character was not wearing blue pants set him in motion. He would come running to me saying, “he’s got blue pants” and because most of the time he says the opposite of what someone is doing or wearing I knew they were not in blue pants before he even came to me. I try to explain that he needs to say the real color or ask for something he wants but that doesn’t always happen and he doesn’t understand. He came to me and put his tablet in front of me. He said, “Curious George pedal pushers man jump in the water.” He was requesting me to say the words for a YouTube search. I found it interesting since pedal pushers are what my mom wears a lot but because Owen only wants everyone to wear blue pants she hasn’t been wearing them around him since he had the huge meltdown. I pray in September when we go to the autism specialist they will be able to help us with more answers. He didn’t want to go anywhere today but we have a very full week ahead so I was fine with staying home and we got no sleep. I hope he sleeps tonight. His belly had to be full after all the fish he ate tonight so hopefully that will help him sleep. He read a lot again tonight and I was happy about that. His smile kept me going on a very rocky day. I keep reminding myself that when all else fails succeed at something else. Some days feel overwhelming but know that tomorrow can be anything you want it to be. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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    I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.

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