I’m supposed to be the strong one. That’s what they tell you; you wouldn’t be given anymore than you can handle. But they failed to mention doors. Someone knocked on our door last night. I was in the other room; we were getting ready to go to his Wednesday night program at church. I didn’t hear the knock, but Owen did. He immediately started saying, “open de door”. By the time I came to the door they were gone, but not forgotten by Owen. He kept trying to open the door. He then took my hand trying to lead me to the door. I was able to distract him, for the moment, by telling him we were leaving, but when someone knocks on a door he expects a response; he didn’t get one. We left, on the drive he kept screaming, knocking on the window of the car, “knock knock who’s dere open de door”. The closer we got to our destination, he began to calm, focusing more on the fact that we had to “stop at de wed wights”. He had a great night, but once we got home, his concerns were focused again on the door. Distraction is what I have to do, giving him tasks, and trying to keep him focused on other things. He was tired last night, falling asleep relatively easily, but getting into bed with me at some point in the middle of the night. Morning came, and he was full steam ahead. He yelled for his teacher, cried for the door, and screamed to “turn de light offT” as I tried to get us ready. He calmed down as I put his clothes out, and started tickling him. My mind races, hoping to find ways to keep my baby calm, before a meltdown even begins. A door sign is what I need, explaining not to knock unless they have to. One day at a time. Owen’s growing, and changing right before my eyes. I see it, and I know that tomorrow he will find more ways to express himself. Tomorrow I will be stronger, today I will be thankful for my sweet baby O. Know that you are a lot stronger than you think you are. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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