I panicked a little about the lights last night as I heard Owen running to my room. I left a light on in the house again, too tired to go turn it off when I went to bed. I wondered if we would have hours of him in complete meltdown because the wrong light was on at the wrong time. A smart house flashed across my mind. Wouldn’t that be a joyous thing, knowing I could magically turn on and off lights at will. I wonder if that would be worse or better for Owen. He was up, but he did not run straight to my room. The panic had to go away, I had to remain as calm as I could so it wouldn’t excite him even more. I was able to distract him enough to get him into my bed. Glorious, glorious sleep then happened for my sweet baby O. Me, not so much, but at least there was no meltdown, from either one of us. I’ve cried myself to sleep many nights, wanting answers, wishing I knew how to help my baby more, and from pure exhaustion that wouldn’t allow my body to even sleep. He’s so happy this morning. It’s our adventure day. We are starting our day off with a twist though. One of my biggest joys is when Owen can tell me his thoughts and emotions. He asked to see one of his friends that he hadn’t seen in quite a while. We were meeting them for breakfast and then going bowling after that. I wait for the words, emotions, thoughts, dreams, inspirations, needs, wants, and everything else that Owen stores waiting for him to be able to share them with me. I’m amazed at his memory and what he says once he can find the words. Sometimes it’s years later that he is finally able to put everything together to explain what he saw, wanted, or needed. I’ll never forget when he looked at a stuffed animal in his bed and after having it for over two years he told me the name of the person that gave it to him and what we called the animal. We hadn’t talked about it in over a year at that point and here he was telling me about it. Never give up. Today is one moment in time and tomorrow is a brand new day. The journey is always evolving and the new joys are right around the corner. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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