Sometimes sausage grease gets in the way of a good day and then other days you have to laugh and say it makes a pretty good hair gel. Owen knows how to use a fork but fingers and toes are much easier to eat with. Oh yes, even the toes, but I really don’t want to think about that. I have so much sausage grease in my hair from Owen’s breakfast I kinda forgot about it. My sensory child doesn’t think twice about rubbing food all over his face or hair or body. And he comes to me with a “big hug” immediately grabbing for my hair. Some days I want to sob a river because I just don’t really want sausage grease or pizza or whatever else he is eating in my hair but I have to put it out of my mind so I don’t go out of my mind. I’m constantly having to stay on top of the situation at hand. I put Owen’s lunch on the table, I went to get the rest of mine, not even ten feet from him, and turn to see him sitting on the table once again. My heart stops every time he does this. He’s sitting on a table that he has already loosened so many of the screws they keep falling out and I’ve put braces and different bolts on hoping it doesn’t collapse under his weight. I thought this table would be perfect. It was like the Three Bears of tables, how many do you have to go through before you find one that is safe enough for your child. I remind him to sit numerous times during our meal and then I breathe. He understands no danger and have to remind him constantly to be careful, which he repeats the words back to me when he is doing something he shouldn’t. I have a big yoga ball for Owen that he loves to jump on. He jumped so hard on it he loosened the air plug. This needed immediate action. The meltdown was happening before I could even think what was happening and then I heard the telltale signs of air coming from the ball. I was able to get the plug back in but it had already lost tons of air. I had to get the pump right away and thankfully I knew exactly where it was, which is not always the case with my mad organizing skills. He was still not pleased with how long this was taken me. I quickly realized I needed to make him pump the ball back up. He stood there calmer than he had been and pumped it with me. Then he pushed it back into my hands and watched but calmly watched. A relief washed over me. I think through my joys today, trying to erase all the anxiety I feel from not being on top of every single thing before it happens. “Siri I want church please in German”, Owen said. He listened and then said, “I want church please in French”. This is a day for rejoicing in every language. Find what motivates you and give yourself credit for what you have accomplished. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.