I gotta remember the good stuff, I gotta. Some days are hard, some days are harder than hard. But there’s a silver lining in there somewhere if you look for it. Maybe it’s more of a shade of silver but find it. Holding onto the emotions wears you out and believe me I am worn out but today as hard and emotional as I was I saw the beauty in the emotions and pushed forward. Thankfully, Owen slept all night and woke up in a good mood. He slept till almost six o’clock. He was stuck on what day of the week it was, and what was happening over the next few days but he was happy. We got dressed and went outside to wait for the bus. He was laughing about when the bus would be coming. He kept pointing again to the wrong direction that the bus would come from. When the bus got there, he ran from one part of the yard to near the street. A smile washed across his face as it open the doors. I wanted to try to go someplace when he got home from school. I think he had the same idea which he usually doesn’t. As soon as he got off the bus, he started talking about taking his bike for a walk. I wasn’t sure if he would walk back out the door once we put his stuff away. It didn’t go according to his plan. He said he wanted to go but what we did was not what he was expecting. He was not pleased once we got in the car. I was going to take him to our church park and let him ride his bike, but he kept telling me he wanted to walk his bike. After a lot of screaming and him telling me he wanted to walk his bike, we came home. I told him when we were in the car that I was sorry we weren’t doing what he expected but he had said that he wanted to go walk his bike. I’m not sure why he got so upset but I think he wanted to ride it at a different location, but he couldn’t tell me where. When we got home, he got out of the car and he held my hand. I think he knew it was all hard. I guess he just wanted to walk here. Once we got back inside, he was calm and excited about the week ahead. He kept yelling about the lobster tooth and laughing hysterically. He watches a video about a lobster and then for some reason he thinks it’s funny that they may pull the lobster's tooth. He didn’t want to eat much for dinner and he kept asking me about the days ahead. He knows he will be going to school for the rest of this week and then he keeps saying “no school on Monday.” I’m praying that the transition for the next few days will go smoothly for him and he will be able to enjoy his summer. When he got in bed, he kept talking about going to the “bank on Saturday” instead of going to grandma's house. I’m not sure why he was concerned about us going to the bank on Saturday, but he got up numerous times before he finally fell asleep. I explained to him that we weren’t going to the bank on Saturday and that he would be going to see his grandma. Some days it’s so hard for him to understand what his days will be like forward especially when he has a routine that he wants to go by. I’m thankful when he got out of the car that he realized I was emotional too, and he grabbed my hand and we walked up the steps. I’m thankful for that connection and then he understood that I was there with him in those emotions. I told him I loved him and I hoped we could go someplace tomorrow after school. Our journey is not always easy to explain but the love sure is. Share your story and share ours. Your journey may not be the same as ours but it is important and there’s always someone that needs to hear it. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.