His concern for Monday is overwhelming to us both. He is so concerned that there is no school on Monday. My mom and I worked through this with him yesterday and I followed through with it again this morning. We talked about it being a holiday and that no one was going to be at school. This is the tricky part. How do you explain school is closed for a holiday but his therapies are not? Each day I try to go through these moments with him.
We are working on answering questions. Many times he will answer halfheartedly or ignore me when I ask a question. There are times when we don’t hear each other but this is more in the times that he is too focused on what he is doing. I am trying to change the way I ask him questions. I’m changing it to choices instead of leaving it open-ended because I know that not having a list of options is sometimes harder for him. I however like when he says that he wants something different or has another option because that proves it is his choice.
He was calm as we got ready for church and he listened as I gave him instructions. I was thankful for this. I told him to keep his tablet off until we got in the car. And he did. It was once again progress.
We drove towards church and I asked him what was on the side of that road, once again seeing if he would mention the snow. He said, “Woods.” I asked him what was past the woods and he said, “The kangaroo.” In this particular area, he has always told me to turn right or left at the kangaroo. I was hoping this time he might be able to tell me what the kangaroo was this time. I asked him what a kangaroo was. He said, “Kangaroo boing” so the answer isn’t completed but there are connections.
The trip continued and he continued to focus on the days ahead but still said “Focus on today.” I once again talked to him about his brain being amazing and that he can accomplish anything if he sets his mind to it so he can hold onto the answers he knows.
I folded laundry. On my bed. This was huge. Not once did he scream or get upset. Not once did he yell at me or have a meltdown. This has been something that has caused meltdowns for years. I’m always on pins and needles. And it’s not like everything is always put away but he has a problem when things are in places he can’t handle. He sees clothes as home clothes and going-out clothes. I think this was well established early on and I didn’t even realize the incredible impact it would make on our lives. Even when I lay our clothes out to get ready that is still hard on him. Today, today was our victory, and the clothes that I was folding were on the bed.
He was very calm for the rest of the day however his only focus was that he wanted to know what his days ahead looked like even though he had asked about it numerous times all day long. Routine is not routine if it is not routine and there is nothing routine about being out of school but going to other activities. It is all hard on him. He asked for his grandma, music therapist, and vision doctor all day. He knows he is going to see all three but it’s still hard on him.
Bedtime is always met the same way but he listened and thankfully sleep happened. Each day is a gift. His smile, laugh, and those big beautiful eyes are exactly what my heart needs. Focus on the good stuff and set your goals for your future. Smiles to all and donut daze!