I was hoping for a later start to our day but we at least made it until five in the morning. I woke in a pretty good mood and Owen seemed happy so that made me happy. I asked him if he knew what today was and he said, “it’s May.” It’s an emotional journey. The only thing I’ve ever wanted to be was a momma. When I was very young I decided I wanted seven kids and I thought I could plan it. A boy, a girl, a boy, twin girls, a boy, and a girl. The twin girls were going to be Mackenzie and Colby so they could be called Mac & Cheese. I remember the day Owen was born and they put him in my arms. It will be a moment that I treasure for the rest of my life. I wasn’t sure if I could have kids and there he was my little miracle. And to this day he proves exactly why he is a miracle. He ate a huge breakfast and asked every few minutes when we were going to church. He also wanted to make sure I knew we had to go by the windows today. He watched a video where someone fixed a Fisher Price BeatBo by taking it apart with a screwdriver and then cleaning it up, changing its batteries, and putting it back together. He brought me his BeatBo and told me it needed batteries so I got out the screwdriver I have in the drawer and replaced the batteries that didn’t need to be replaced. He took it back to his room and a few minutes later I hear him run past me to the kitchen and a drawer open and back to his room he went. This is new and this was huge. His fine motor skills are not completely developed so this is not something he can easily do himself. He is learning how to use a screwdriver but it is a much larger toy one that he has. He is starting to get the concept but he still wouldn’t be able to take the screws out of this toy by himself but he sure tried and that to me was the huge victory for the day. On the flip side of that coin, I’m glad he can’t do it yet because maturity level he is not ready to take things about but I’m still so very proud of him for trying. He looked in the drawer later for the screwdriver to try to fix it again but I moved it. I didn’t want him to try to fix it without me. We got to church and the tears flowed as I sat listening to the music that I should have been standing up for and singing to. It was emotional. I feel empty missing my brother on Mother’s Day. My heart aches for my mom and the tears are flowing once again knowing there is nothing I can do to take her sadness away. When we left church he rode his bike for a while. He didn’t want to go get something to eat but he sure wanted to go by the windows. When we got home I fixed him to lunch. He sat at the table singing nursery rhymes and then told me he wanted to take a bath. He said, “how long will it take to wash the mud off.” He didn’t have any mud on him so I have a feeling that is why he wants to take so many baths lately. I think that is something one of his Curious George books says and he is recreating the moment. If that’s what he wants to do I’ll take it because Curious George got him to go to sleep on his own so maybe it will help him understand mud and rain. The rest of the night was filled with food and laughter. I’m thankful for a great Mother’s Day with my Sweet Baby O and proud of his accomplishments. Believe in the moment that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to and watch your world change. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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