Sweet Baby O - Our Autism Journey
Contact Me
  • Home
  • The Daily
  • Paintings
  • Products
  • Church
  • Down This Road
  • Book
  • Podcast

Mid Wednesday

6/16/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture
I never want to walk out my door again. The meltdowns, the emotions, the screams, they are all raw and real. And then add in Owen repeating every place or person he has stayed with for the last few years and I’m in circles. He did so well on our entire drive until the last two minutes on our way home. He screamed so hard he was making himself gag. I hardly said any words to him all the way to therapy and all the way home. That in itself is hard but he did so much better than most of our drives lately. He wants a negative response from me so he can scream louder and pretty much anything I say or do causes him to struggle. I’m exhausted trying to figure it all out and keeping ahead of his emotions. My heart aches for my sweet baby O. How do I calm him, how do I explain to him that he needs to learn to breathe. I wish I could explain to him that not everything goes according to plan. I keep thinking I will go another route or magically this phase will run its course but that could take months or years. Plus he knows all the roads around us and where they lead. I can’t avoid an area because all roads lead to somewhere for him. All I can do is pray for calm to wash over him and that tomorrow he will understand when we have to be in the car again. I’m constantly wondering if he would do better if he couldn’t see out of the car. I try to decide if something like a drape all around his carseat would help. I always bring distractions with us like his tablet, weighted blanket, or food but nothing helps. Today I’m going to breathe and think about all of the amazing things he can do. He’s learning a new language that I don’t even recognize where it’s from. I’ll have to look it up. He is singing Humpty Dumpty in this new language and he’ll soon add it to the others he knows. He’s ready for school tomorrow, asking for his new teacher. Tonight he also asked about when he would see his other teacher again. If only I could figure out how to go straight from June to August when he returns to school. I keep praying the next few weeks go slow. He’s doing a great job wearing his glasses and they make me smile. Tomorrow is a brand new day. Keeping pushing forward and know that you are not alone. Smiles to all and donut daze!
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.

    Archives

    May 2025
    April 2025
    March 2025
    February 2025
    January 2025
    December 2024
    November 2024
    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    June 2024
    May 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    May 2017
    January 2016
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed