Some days you have to move forward even if you want to claim ostrich rules and stick your head in the ground. I suppose we kinda slept last night but I’m dreaming of great sleep tonight. We shall see. I feel like I’m stuck in this never-ending project mode that nothing ever gets accomplished. I guess that means socks still won’t be matched tomorrow, probably. I was eating cherries and Owen started singing “hi ho cherry-o”. He was gluten and dairy free for years but I relaxed that to try more foods with him. Only recently though is when I started giving him regular chocolate milk instead of almond milk. The brain-gut connection is so huge and I keep wondering if he is having more meltdowns because of the milk. I am going to start him back on the almond milk and see how he does. I told him we were going places today. I dragged my feet as long as I could and then got us dressed. His meltdowns and emotions have been so strong lately I don’t want to go anywhere but I know that we need to go everywhere. I have to keep pushing both of us to grow. I want to be completely sensitive to his emotions and needs but I also know that he is such a people person that we need to keep building his skills and get through all of these moments. I took him to a farmers market that also has restaurants. I convinced him that he wanted to go because he was going to ride in his “little red wagon”. He loves riding in his wagon and it helps me because I can push him and not worry about him staying close to me even if we do wear the armbands. Once we got there he wanted to go and stay. As many times as he told me he was ready to leave he also wanted to “turn right at the kangaroo”. I got us both “coffee” and he really liked his. They made him a cool hot chocolate. And then when I told him we were going to leave he said, “wanna stay let’s stay today turn around”. I told him we were going to go somewhere else and he said, “mommy change” which means he wants to go home and I need to be in home clothes so he knows we are not going back out. I told him I would in a little bit. I wanted to take him to see a new park. It’s sometimes easier to get him to do things if I can show him where we are going first. I didn’t know how the market would go because it had been years since he was there with me but I think it will be a place we can go again. We drove around the park and the whole time he was still telling me I needed to change but he didn’t scream and we made it all the way home with no meltdowns so I count today as a huge victory. It was all emotional because I was waiting for the other shoe to drop but he didn’t take his shoes off in the car, nor go into a meltdown mode, and we had a good day. I’m thankful. Never give up on the miracles yet to happen. Believe in yourself and the rest will follow. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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