Four o’clock and that was done. Owen came to me a few minutes after four in the morning. I thought at least it is after four. “Tablet,” he said. I was kind of surprised he came to me seeking it. He has been going straight to it unless he gets in bed with me. I pushed the coffeemaker button and off I went to the bathroom. I was cranky and Owen was giddy. Popcorn and waffles were the requested foods for breakfast and he ate them all. Today gave me a huge eye-opener on how I need to change the way I prioritize things. I see so much growth in Owen but there are skills I need to work on with him. I’ve been so focused on the things in our lives instead of the time in our lives. Many of his behaviors are repetitive but if I can work with him as they are happening they aren’t as bad. Like he is back to pulling my hair again. He will walk up to me and pull it without even thinking about it. It’s an attention-getter partly and also he knows that it is something I don’t like. I need to help him understand boundaries and emotions when he is dealing with other people. I’m also so tired of not being able to put something where I want it to be and instead it’s in the trash or on the floor. My mind spins with all of the ways to help him with this and stay ahead of everything he is doing. He runs to the bathroom, makes a mess in there, and then by the time I get that cleaned up he has run off to the next room. My room has now become where he wants to be and he doesn’t want me in it unless he wants me in it. This circles round and round. And I want my own room back. He ate his lunch which was a full plate of shrimp. I went to take his plate and asked him to wash his hands. Before I could go in one direction he ran off to my room and got in my bed. It’s partly because I get emotional about it and partly because he wants to get his tablet and hide under the covers but I tell him he has a bed. I sat with him, playing his game and he was laughing hysterically at an elephant and its eyebrows. He thought it was funny that the elephant didn’t have eyebrows. He was playing a firefighter game and he kept telling me that “fire is hot do not touch the fire with your hands.” I try to remind him to not touch anything hot like the microwave or stove. When he won the game he made the muah sound and he said, “pig gives him a kiss muah.” And then a heart floated across the screen. He must have played the game ten times telling me the same thing each time. The rest of the night was filled with him throwing my stuff away, hiding more of my stuff, and him putting other things on the ground. My goal is to declutter everything. It makes me cry thinking about how hard this is on him. I have to figure out a way to simplify all of the clutter and help him understand that not everything has to be in a specific place, especially when it is someone else’s. I breathe. I’m focusing on the good parts of the day. He told me he loved me and that means more than anything in the world. Find your strength and keep moving forward. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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