I wish I could super-size my bladder or remember that I can’t drink anything late anymore. Owen woke as soon as I got up to go to the bathroom. He immediately got in my bed and went right back to sleep after yelling about me not being in bed for a few minutes and thankfully slept the rest of the night. The rollercoaster ride was just getting started for the day though. He wanted me to sit and also wanted me to get him milk and cereal. He was listening to the Disney channel in German on his tablet. He kept running to me to look up different videos talking to me in the German he was watching but I continued to tell him that I understand very few words in German. Yesterday we picked out clothes for both of us to wear for today. I did this with him because I wanted him to feel like he had a choice. He knew we were wearing different clothes but the actual follow-through was harder than expected. He really wanted me to change and he wanted to change to blue pants. I told him we didn’t have time and we had to get to the bus stop. My heart aches and my wheels spin wondering how many ways I can overthink these steps. I need him to understand we have to wear other things, we have to turn right sometimes when he wants to go left, we have to turn lights on even when we don’t want to, and the list goes on and on and on. And truly it should be fine if he wears blue pants every single day but the problem is when someone else doesn’t and that causes him to cry for hours or try to pull their pants off while screaming and having a meltdown. My heart aches. I let his teacher know he was struggling with it but she is so amazing with him I knew it would be ok. Today was their field day and his teacher said he did great. And devoured the pizza they had. This didn’t surprise me with my eating machine. She also told me he had good manners and that makes this momma happy. We talk about being nice to people and respecting their emotions. When he came home on the bus it didn’t go according to plan. He was not happy, wanting me to not wear black pants and instead to be in blue pedal pushers which I never wear. I am not sure why he now wanted me in pedal pushers. I got him inside and the request for pedal pushers continued. I held his hands to get him to breathe and somehow we started singing London Bridges and then If You’re Happy And You Know It. He went to get me blue pants, throwing them at my feet, and trying to pull my pants off by tugging at the cuff. I told him I would change into my house clothes unless he wanted to go someplace. He started eating his veggie straws and chocolate milk. He then gave me a huge hug and said, “I love you”. I can only imagine what he went through with all of his emotions. I am thankful for his hug and words. It means he was processing a lot of this. I always explain to him that we are a team and we have to work together through these emotions. He had a pretty calm evening, eating all of his dinner, and multiple snacks. He got ready for bed without a struggle and then lost a tooth as soon as he went to bed. He was very excited because he thinks he will get to go to the dentist tomorrow so they “can look in the mirror she count you teeth”. He loves going to all of his doctors. I always try to make him understand they are here to help us and that they do amazing things for us. He fell asleep telling me he was going to see his dentist and he was “coming to the white bed in the morning with tablet so he could go to the blue bed”. We shall see how the morning goes but he has a plan. Thankful for his words and that he was calm when he lost his tooth. Never give up on the hope for tomorrow. Find your strength and keep pushing forward. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.