Owen didn’t sleep through the night but once he came to me he fell back asleep quickly and then he slept until almost seven. He’s been falling asleep later and later it seems. As soon as he woke up he reminded me to “get gas to go to church” and that he needed to wear his “green shirt”. Yesterday we discussed how I would need to get gas on our way to church. When he was little I would tell him that mommy had to get gas to make the car go vroom as he would scream at me anytime I had to get gas with him in the car. A lump in my throat formed as I thought about those early days. I kept hoping and praying he would repeat the words I would say to him. I remember the few words he would say and then never say anything again for a very long time. The waiting for those words was a very emotional journey. And some days as he is still learning to use his words and express his feelings it’s rough. He did well on the way to church. No screaming, no directions were told. He sang to me and talked about what he was going to do the next few days. He always likes to talk about his schedule. On the way home since he didn’t scream at me we went to see his windows. However, after we drove by the windows he started screaming at me because I turned to show him the signs and flags he likes but he wanted to go “straight” yelling it at the top of his lungs. He had only seconds sooner told me he wanted to “see the eagle” and then here he was going into a huge meltdown within seconds. My mind spins how quickly it all changes for him. So instead of going by the eagle, I drove home. I don’t know which is the right choice to help the meltdown but I had to get us home. Once we got home he calmed down in a few minutes. The journey feels rough some days. He was pretty much joined to my hip all day after that. Bath time is like the Three Bears story. When he is taking his bath he will say, “it’s too warm it’s too hot it’s too cold” one right after another. He says it hoping I won’t completely turn the water off, filling the tub high. I have to watch him though so he won’t try to turn the water knobs on his own. He doesn’t understand that the water could come out of the faucet hot but luckily when I tell him something like his food is hot he will let it sit for a minute before he starts to eat it. When he was trying to fall asleep he kept doing his fake snoring routine. Then he said he was snorting and he kept repeating “yawn” over and over again. It still took him over an hour to fall asleep. He talked about going to see his teacher, riding the bus, and our therapy tomorrow. And with that our day was done. We talked a lot, he sang to me in numerous languages, and he played several of his instruments. I’m thankful he found peace today after several tough moments. I’m hoping for a great day for him tomorrow. Follow your heart, love with all your might, and share your smile with the world. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.