To The Thursday
“Mommy’s bed” has been repeated at least every twenty seconds or quicker for the last hour. It’s not bedtime but he’s continuing to ask for it. The last two nights have been rough and I’ve let him sleep in my bed both nights. I keep telling myself he’s seeking comfort in a confusing situation and we are doing the best we can. Meanwhile, I want to cry. Potty training, that’s one of those things that seems to be flying out the window with the routine as well. It’s completely hit or miss the last couple of days. Although today I told him that if he stayed dry we would go for a walk. He was dry all day. I also asked him every five minutes to go to the potty it seemed, but he was dry. His teacher sent videos that they watch at school. Owen was watching one of the videos. He then hit pause, came to me and asked me to find “rollercoaster” with the voice-activated option. This was the exact same video he was watching and now wanted me to find. This is something he does all the time. I do not know how to convince him that he doesn’t have to look for a video he is watching. This is a behavior he has done for years now. The night was rough. He cried, screamed, or obsessively asked for mommy’s bed, school, and his teacher. He doesn’t want to always be held through these moments. My baby is hurting and wants his routine back. I want the small semblance of calm we had with our routine. He’s able to express more of his emotions but not necessarily the words to convey what he means. All I keep thinking about is the transition he will have to make with a new school and teacher next year. And I pray he gets to go back to school this year. One day at a time I tell myself, remembering to breathe. Huge hug to all. You are not walking in this journey alone. Find your strength, push forward, and remember tomorrow is a brand new day. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.