When something isn’t routine how do you explain it. Summer is anything but routine for us.And with that said I see growth. Not only in Owen but in me. Or maybe I’m getting thicker skin. Maybe it’s more I’m learning to go with the flow. Either way there’s changes in both of us. But still there are moments it’s hard for us to process. I am trying to teach Owen directions so it will be easier for him in the car. For now everything is “turn left” or “straight up”. He gets upset if I don’t go the direction he wants me to go. I don’t know if that’s part of the routine aspect or that he wants me to drive someplace different. We will be driving down the road, going one direction, and I can hear him mimicking the turn signal noise, wanting me to turn. If I keep going the wrong direction, according to him, I can hear the anxiousness wash over him, and the squeal starts in his voice. The art of distraction is something that I’m working to perfect, knowing we have to take it one step at a time. Owen’s happy today and that makes momma happy. I’m trying to breakout of my own shell of worries. So many things upset Owen or cause meltdowns that I walk on eggshells, wrapped in glass, hoping to not upset the applecart, but here I grow again. There’s a fine line to pushing and letting a moment rest. I’m trying to learn how to show Owen that change is okay, even when I’m not convinced it is, even for me. I’m trying to learn to quiet my own anxiousness, hoping this helps Owen through his moments of anxiety. The calmer I am the calmer he is. Or so I hope. The main thing I’m learning is to breathe. Today is one day. Find hope when you think things are hopeless. Find strength when you think you have none left. And know that today’s worries will be gone in the tomorrows yet to come. I find strength in Owen’s smile and know that love will change the world. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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