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Trying To Be Sunday

11/10/2019

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What mountain did you move to walk out of your door. Some days life feels like it is spiraling and spiraling. What do you do when it keeps feeling like everything is falling out of your grasp and you keep doing the same things that keep you in the same spot. You stop. You just stop. You find a way to change what you were doing and do something different. I’m learning that I have to take care of myself and that means doing things that I love. The other day I got it in my mind about how when you take a flight they always tell you to secure your air mask and then your child’s mask. I thought they’ve got that right. We must keep pushing forward and working on ourselves to be able to help our children grow. I’m thankful for how much Owen is growing. All the way home from church he asked to go eat. He’s been asking for several days now. I haven’t taken him because he hasn’t been feeling well, but today I decided we would go. He’s not contagious but he still has a cough. He is a sensory seeker so he is still learning how his body works. He likes to make himself cough so that he can feel his body’s reaction and mine as well. I try to get him to remain calm but that doesn’t always work. When we went to the restaurant he had a coughing fit, most of it coming from him drinking too much too fast. These are the moments that make me want to stay home but I push forward to help us grow. I have to look past the reaction of others and know that I’m doing the best for us. It’s very emotional. I also have to decide what’s Owen, his age, or autism. They all are a part of him but play different roles in how he handles the world. No less than twenty times in the last hour has he asked me what his schedule for tomorrow is. He knows that it’s Monday and he should be going to school but it’s a holiday. He’s already missed many days because of him being sick. Learning to let go and grow at the same time can be hard but know that you can move past this moment in time and accomplish great things. Make today matter. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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    I'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart.

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