Where Are You Sunday

Yesterday was one of those rough around the edges kinda days. Nothing horrible, middle of the road, with the beauty of the world mixed in, and a side of spectacular, but still rough. Owen asked for his teacher all day long. How in the world do you explain to a child that he only has four more days of school for the year. I hear other parents rejoicing summer vacation and my heart is crying. My sweet baby O thrives on his days of routine. And here we are faced with summer. He is going to summer school but that’s only twelve days. Twelve days. His new favorite song is the theme song from Phineas and Ferb. “There’s 104 days of summer vacation and school comes along just to end it”, Owen sings. I see a sense of irony in that. I try to give him as much routine without school, but this year he feels even more attached to the routine of his days. For Owen lack of routine means more outbursts and meltdowns. This is my child, my love, and my heart breaks that I can’t give him something he wants; like school every day. He’s learning how to deal with emotions. He’s gone through this cycle before. Yesterday he played a game and kept losing. He wanted to lose because he wanted to cry and scream. He did it multiple times. I took his tablet away. We worked on painting, we played games, and we did compression therapy. As soon as I let Owen have his tablet back he went right back to the same game, at the same spot, to lose again. Thirty minutes went by of the same reactions, the same screams, the same emotions, and then he moved on. I should know that I can’t stop this learning train because I’ve tried before, but it’s hard hearing my baby go through these emotions. It’s also mentally challenging for me to let him go through them. I have to put my emotions aside and let him literally scream it out. Today I breathe, today I become stronger, and today I hold my baby a little tighter, and tell him that we will get through this thing called life together. Know that you are stronger than you could ever imagine. Make today matter. Smiles to all and donut daze!