Owen got into bed with me at some point. We both fell back asleep pretty quickly. I woke before him, the outside world waking me this time, and I got up. I turned on the light, made some hot tea, and as I was sitting down I heard his screams. This seems to happen more, and more. He can’t process that I have turned on the lights without him, or maybe it’s too bright, I’m really not sure, but he runs through the house, yelling “turn de light onT”; flipping the switches on, and off, as he goes. He said, “momma get me cracker momma get ewe some”. I got his milk, and cereal, putting it on his table. He intertwined his dialog with mine, saying both parts of the conversation. You never realize what words you say over, and over again, until your child repeats back to you what you say. Early on I tried to use the same phrases, and expressions with him, hoping that he would associate it with the item, or activity we needed to do. Years later, years, he says the things that I said to him as a baby, and then toddler. The amount of knowledge he has stored, waiting for the day he could use it astonishes me. The more he finds his voice the more those phrases come out. But there are days like today, I have to sit back, and drink my hot tea, so I don’t get too emotional; days like today that he forgets his words. As we were sitting at the bus stop, in the car again, he kept saying “de fish is comin de fish will be here real soon”. At first I thought he was talking about going to see the fish, but then I realized he meant the bus. I didn’t try to correct him, but I did use the word. I said, you are right the bus will be here real soon. After that he exchanged the two words with each other. Maybe it was the moment, or how he wasn’t processing it, but it’s always hard when I know he can say those words. One day at a time. This doesn’t happen as often as it used to, but it’s still the reminder of yesterday year. My baby has come so far, and today as the bus was coming, he looked at me, and he smiled his big toothy grin. The little things, that’s what matters. Find victories in your moments of challenges. Remember every step forward is still a step. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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