Every emotion, every tear, every single thing was right there on my sleeve and today was one of the hardest days I’ve had in a very long time. Owen mostly handled today pretty well with only a side of emotions meltdowns, and hard. I see my baby struggle and I struggle. Even though he had a fairly good day it was those repetitive emotions that kept us in several hard moments that we had to work through. It always makes me wonder what else I can do to help him.
The one bathroom strikes again. Old house, noisy floors, and me not exactly the quietest walker got Owen up early. He was excited about his appointment because he couldn’t wait to see his doctor but he was very concerned about all the other parts of his day. He is so worried that people aren’t going to be there. I tried to explain again about how he wasn’t going to be at school so they would miss him but for now that confuses him. We got ready for his appointment and off we went.
The whole way there he wanted to know who was going to be at school when I dropped him off. “I don’t know” is not something that he wants to hear. “We’ll have to wait and see” doesn’t go over any better. It’s so emotional for him. His appointment went well and we will go back in two months to check his progress. Owen was able to answer the doctor’s questions and could see how he was handling things better. So even though it is still very emotional for him he is still making huge progress. He was much calmer as well for this appointment.
The two things I have to remember about Owen are he loves computers and he is quick. When we got to the office they did an intake for weight, height, and any new information. The technician came to get us and Owen ran ahead the five feet to the room. That’s all it took for him to get on the aide’s computer and restart it because he likes to see the different screens come up. Thankfully he was very understanding and got it back up quickly. When we were with the doctor he realized he had chewing gum. He was very excited about this and almost stuck his fingers in the doctor’s mouth. We are working on personal space.
He was very excited I was taking him to school “over the blue river.” He again was asking about who was going to be there. It was one of the many things we talked with his doctor about. When we got to school the aide met him but not his people. His teacher was out and his regular aide was in the room. The aide quickly told him he was there and would see him once he put his things in his locker. I know this has been hard on him not having a set routine and the ripple effect continues when he is trying to process what all this means.
When he got home from school he wanted no snack because he was ready to get to the pool. He couldn’t process leaving but he was ready to go. He stood on our steps yelling about going to the pool but wouldn’t go to the car to get in. It’s all a process but he was excited to be going.
He did better and worse this time at the pool. He was on high alert because he wanted his swim instructor there and instead there were other people. He jumped off the steps that led into the pool which was huge. He is trying to jump off the diving board but I will not let him even try until he can breathe in the water and swim to the side. The diving board is in ten feet deep section. He has to be able to handle it. This upsets him that I won’t let him but he is only today starting to even jump off one of the steps into the pool. He will get it. I know he will.
He did not want to leave but he was getting highly agitated so I told him it was time to go. He listened because I said if we didn’t go he would not be able to go back. There was a little girl that got in the pool and he thought she should be riding her bicycle so this upset him. They spoke in a foreign language so I was hoping he would make a connection with them but he couldn’t process it since he wanted the little girl riding her bicycle that wasn’t even there.
Bananas have become a full meltdown again. It switched quickly. He has been doing fine with them. I have been getting all the time trying to stay ahead of it. I pulled one of the bunch and before I could even finish he was in the kitchen and that was that. I always wonder how his mind will look at a banana and say it’s a problem. This I hope is a temporary thing since we have worked so hard on this and it makes me pray rain does not cause meltdowns again.
I pray he sleeps all night so he can go to his grandma’s house if it stops snowing. Each day I pray for those connections and I try to remember how far we’ve come and we have come a long way. I’m thankful for his big jumps today in everything he did. Today was hard, harder than harder for me but watching my sweet baby O grow is the greatest gift of all. Be inspired by the world around you and never give up. Smiles to all and donut daze!
The one bathroom strikes again. Old house, noisy floors, and me not exactly the quietest walker got Owen up early. He was excited about his appointment because he couldn’t wait to see his doctor but he was very concerned about all the other parts of his day. He is so worried that people aren’t going to be there. I tried to explain again about how he wasn’t going to be at school so they would miss him but for now that confuses him. We got ready for his appointment and off we went.
The whole way there he wanted to know who was going to be at school when I dropped him off. “I don’t know” is not something that he wants to hear. “We’ll have to wait and see” doesn’t go over any better. It’s so emotional for him. His appointment went well and we will go back in two months to check his progress. Owen was able to answer the doctor’s questions and could see how he was handling things better. So even though it is still very emotional for him he is still making huge progress. He was much calmer as well for this appointment.
The two things I have to remember about Owen are he loves computers and he is quick. When we got to the office they did an intake for weight, height, and any new information. The technician came to get us and Owen ran ahead the five feet to the room. That’s all it took for him to get on the aide’s computer and restart it because he likes to see the different screens come up. Thankfully he was very understanding and got it back up quickly. When we were with the doctor he realized he had chewing gum. He was very excited about this and almost stuck his fingers in the doctor’s mouth. We are working on personal space.
He was very excited I was taking him to school “over the blue river.” He again was asking about who was going to be there. It was one of the many things we talked with his doctor about. When we got to school the aide met him but not his people. His teacher was out and his regular aide was in the room. The aide quickly told him he was there and would see him once he put his things in his locker. I know this has been hard on him not having a set routine and the ripple effect continues when he is trying to process what all this means.
When he got home from school he wanted no snack because he was ready to get to the pool. He couldn’t process leaving but he was ready to go. He stood on our steps yelling about going to the pool but wouldn’t go to the car to get in. It’s all a process but he was excited to be going.
He did better and worse this time at the pool. He was on high alert because he wanted his swim instructor there and instead there were other people. He jumped off the steps that led into the pool which was huge. He is trying to jump off the diving board but I will not let him even try until he can breathe in the water and swim to the side. The diving board is in ten feet deep section. He has to be able to handle it. This upsets him that I won’t let him but he is only today starting to even jump off one of the steps into the pool. He will get it. I know he will.
He did not want to leave but he was getting highly agitated so I told him it was time to go. He listened because I said if we didn’t go he would not be able to go back. There was a little girl that got in the pool and he thought she should be riding her bicycle so this upset him. They spoke in a foreign language so I was hoping he would make a connection with them but he couldn’t process it since he wanted the little girl riding her bicycle that wasn’t even there.
Bananas have become a full meltdown again. It switched quickly. He has been doing fine with them. I have been getting all the time trying to stay ahead of it. I pulled one of the bunch and before I could even finish he was in the kitchen and that was that. I always wonder how his mind will look at a banana and say it’s a problem. This I hope is a temporary thing since we have worked so hard on this and it makes me pray rain does not cause meltdowns again.
I pray he sleeps all night so he can go to his grandma’s house if it stops snowing. Each day I pray for those connections and I try to remember how far we’ve come and we have come a long way. I’m thankful for his big jumps today in everything he did. Today was hard, harder than harder for me but watching my sweet baby O grow is the greatest gift of all. Be inspired by the world around you and never give up. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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