We had storms last night that woke me from my sleep numerous times. Then I looked at the clock and it was almost six in the morning. I listened for Owen and didn’t hear him. I got up and tried to be very quiet. When I came out of the bathroom I looked and he was asleep on the couch sitting straight up with the blanket over his head. He surprisingly didn’t wake when I went to the bathroom or got coffee. He slept for almost another thirty minutes. We had a very busy day ahead that I didn’t tell him about because I didn’t want him to get anxious. We ate some breakfast and after a while, I told him that he would be going to see his grandma. The first thing he said was “no breakfast.” He then told me “mommy go bye bye.” I told him that I would and then we would go to his therapy later. He was afraid we were going to a restaurant to eat breakfast. He then got concerned we were going on a trip and he started telling me “no trip today.” This is why it is so hard for us to do anything out of his routine. It’s not a matter of him doing something at the moment but the ripple effect that follows. He needs his routine and it is extremely hard on him when anything is out of his realm. I promised him we were not going on a trip. Next, he got it in his mind about the petting zoo. He went through the same steps. “No petting zoo today,” he said. I told him we were only going to grandma’s house and then therapy. I put some laundry to fold on my bed. He asked me to get him more milk so I left it sitting there. I came back to my bed and he followed me. I sat down to start folding it and he threw it all on the floor. Laundry is not supposed to be on my bed in his mind and anytime I put something on it he will throw it on the floor or take it to the trash. I breathe. When it was time to leave he wanted to take his robot with him so he could show his therapist. He had been telling me every day he wanted to show her so I made sure he took it with him in his bag. We also took one of his extra robots to leave at grandma’s house. Before we left he told me he wanted to take his “puzzle letters with me” to show his other therapist. I told him we couldn’t take both today but he had to make a choice of which one he wanted to take today so he chose the robot. It was a big robot party in the car there. He stayed with grandma for a few hours. I picked him up and I took him to therapy. When he showed his robot to his therapist he told her “I made a choice.” I explained that he got to choose which one he wanted to bring and he brought the robot. He told her “next time bring puzzle letter with you.” Sometimes he has a hard time with how he references himself in sentences but I think how incredibly far he has come. I was getting a new roof put on our house and I knew that having all of the people outside all day and the noises for hours would be too much for Owen. When we left therapy we went to get some chicken nuggets. I knew he loved the chicken nuggets from one place so I took him there but he kept asking for a cheeseburger. He ate the eight nuggets and then immediately requested, “ten chicken nuggets and a cheeseburger please.” We had plenty of time because I knew they wouldn’t be done with our roof so off to the next restaurant we went. By this time I wanted him to see what they were doing so he would know they would be there when we got home. We sat for a while and I gave him the other chicken nuggets and then we drove by our house. I asked him if he wanted to go inside or drive by his beloved windows. The windows won and won and won. He was calm and not screaming about them so we drove around for quite some time. I drove him back to our house and I told him we could go inside but we would hear the noises from the roof. I quickly rushed him past everyone as much as I could. He ran off to the bathroom when we walked inside and he yelled, “mommy change dress on.” He had had enough of this day. Thankfully the roofers were done in less than a couple of hours. He kept asking me to turn off the blender but was pretty calm in general about the noise. He ate the cheeseburger and French fries when we got home and then requested two waffles. In a three-hour timeframe, he ate a lot. Bedtime went easily and hopefully, the adventures of the day will let him sleep late again tomorrow. He knows he will “be with mommy” tomorrow and he was happy with that. The journey is not always easy to explain but the love sure is. I’m thankful for his words today and his growth. Today is a moment in time. Find your strength and keep moving forward. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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Nerves of spaghetti was pretty much how my day went, followed by hopeful swells of my indecisions and progress for Owen, but we made it to bedtime. He woke a little after five. As early as that is I’m beyond thankful that he has been mostly sleeping through the night. He was in a very clingy mood for most of the day though but also very interactive. He came to me with his tablet, requesting milk, showing me an app, and telling me “no potty today” was going to happen. I do not think at this point my eyes could even open on their own. I’m not sure why I haven’t installed one of those fancy pot filler arms in my headboard that is directly connected to the coffeepot. It would sure help with these early mornings. I got up started my coffee and fixed the requested milk and cereal that I knew he wouldn’t eat right away. When I sat down with my coffee Owen brought his tablet to me. He was playing an app that was like a board game with dice and cards on the screen. He said, “I’ll show you what I got” clicking one of the cards and then he quickly added “whoo whoo.” I realized he thought the word “I’ll” was “owl”. I wrote out the words for him to see the difference. He didn’t understand that “I will” became “I’ll” nor does he probably understand how that works but I still like to go over the steps with him. He then got the car card and he wanted to repeat it with me when I explain that it was two different words and I had him emphasize the D in the word “card.” His speech is improving and wants to learn now. It’s amazing to have these interactions with me. He told me he wanted to take his robot to show his speech therapist tomorrow. After breakfast, we went to get his glasses. I wasn’t sure how this was going to go. I wore camo pants. It took every bit of me convincing myself and him to walk out the door. He kept running to my room to get me blue pants. I told him there weren’t any in there and if he wanted to get his glasses we had to leave. He finally walked out the door. Most of the people were wearing blue pants and the one guy that wasn’t promised Owen he would wear them tomorrow. I was thankful he went along with it. We got home without another meltdown. The rest of the day went about the same. He sat with me many times throughout the day and we played numerous games. He laughed a lot and this makes my heart sing. When we were playing one of his games every time he would click on a letter I would say a completely different object than what was on his screen. He would immediately say what it was. I was glad because he constantly says the wrong thing and I’m trying to get him to understand he has to say what it is or express his real emotions. This is not always easy for him but as time moves forward I think he will understand more. The night went quickly and he fell asleep as soon as his head hit his pillow. All in all, he had a good day. You probably think there is no one else that can understand the struggles that you are facing. You are not alone. We may not be on the same path but that’s why I share this journey, that’s why I talk about all the different aspects. Today I had to remember to breathe a lot. Tomorrow is a brand new day. And we can all move forward with our journey. Smiles to all and donut daze!
People say to me I don’t know how you do it. The answer is duct tape and God but not necessarily in that order. I pray a lot and sometimes I roar loudly wanting peace to wash over both of us. I’ve always said, “why do today what I can put off and not do again tomorrow.” This is probably not the wisest of advice because now I’m learning a lot about how everything snowballs together. Thankfully Owen slept great last night. He woke around five and that would have been great if I hadn’t stayed up past midnight. He was happy, interested in showing me everything on his tablet, and wanted to “watch the movie” on my phone. He hasn’t watched this video in a year or so it seems and now he wants to watch it constantly. For some reason, he calls it “the movie” even though it is a person playing a handpan drum that was live on Facebook. Everything is becoming overwhelming to Owen. Trashcan yesterday, toy boxes today, and all I can do is pray. He was calm most of the day and then he had these moments when he was only able to focus on the people he wanted to see and what they would be wearing. The problem is that he needed them in blue pants already except for the therapist that introduced him to the robot and all he wanted to do was talk about it. His other robot arrived. I had ordered the first one before I found the other two at the thrift shop. When I showed it to him he was concerned with several things. He wanted to know if the robot spoke Russian, where the box was since it was used it had no box, and if he could take them to show his therapist. He was highly disappointed that it wasn’t in Russian and then asked me for it in French. So this momma made a few phone calls. I called Fisher Price and asked them if it did come in other languages and I was told the only other one is in French. The hunt has begun. He wanted a different app on his tablet that was a Fisher Price game. He pushed the button to download it and he said, “downloading please wait a moment.” I thought that sounded like he was about to do a review. He was very interactive with me today, asking questions, and being very polite when he was talking to me. He took my hand and said, “sandwich please.” We have to go get his glasses that they fixed. He got upset last time we were there about one of the assistants not wearing blue pants. I didn’t even think about it when trying to decide when we would go to pick them up. I’m now concerned he will be upset like he was at the dentist so I may ask them to bring his glasses to the car. I am always trying to stay ten steps ahead of his meltdowns but I don’t always know what is going to trigger it or when. I wore pajama pants today hoping that it would help him change his focus on me wearing pants at home but it was instead a constant question for when I would change. I breathe. Tiny baby steps to keep us moving forward. He kept me on my toes and entertained today. He also made me cry harder when I already thought I was crying as hard as I could. Grief is emotional and when I was staring at one more broken thing I thought I can no longer call my brother for him to tell me what I should do, who I should call, or when he would come since he lived far away. Owen doesn’t understand my emotions and sometimes I don’t either but he did not want me crying. Tomorrow I’ll be stronger for me, tomorrow I’ll shine for Owen. There are days that are hard but you move forward, and grow. Let your wings spread, let your eyes shine, and let your heart love. Smiles to all and donut daze!
Owen struggled to go to sleep last night and woke up early this morning. I heard him playing with his tablet before it was even five in the morning. I could hardly focus I was so exhausted. It’s hard to go to sleep immediately when he does at night. I try to catch up on other things I can’t accomplish when he is awake. Plus, it’s my time to decompress. It’s an emotional journey for both of us. The morning went fast but he kept talking about pulling one of his teeth. He struggles with his teeth being loose or when the new ones are coming in. He always says, “pull a tooth.” He feels it all. The morning went pretty quickly and he was mostly in a good mood. He wanted me to call the dentist so I said I would see if she could see us. I thought it looked fine but he had been pulling on it so much I was afraid I was missing something. Luckily they had an opening and I told him we would go. He was thrilled about going. He loves the dentist and couldn’t wait. He asked me every few minutes when we were going. Once it was time to go it all turned into slow motion. I finally got him out the door and we were on our way. It’s almost a twenty-minute car ride. He was very calm, talking about going, and playing on his tablet. That all changed when I did not turn at the light he was expecting me to turn. I told him we were not going by the train depot but he still expects us to go and part of the problem is I’m not the one he usually drives by it with. He generally goes with my mom and I don’t know all the correct turns and rules. When I did not turn he instantly went into a meltdown. My heart sank. I know this is hard on him. I don’t know how else to tell him that we aren’t doing what he expects except to tell him. He doesn’t do well with picture schedules or cards. He’s only now learning to even look at them but he doesn’t want to use them to help with transitions at all. I kept driving to the dentist. I asked him if he wanted to go home or see the dentist. He was calmer. Still on edge but calmer. He wanted to go. We should have stayed in the car. We got into the office and I explained we were in meltdown mode. I sat down with Owen and within a few minutes, they brought us back to the room. The only problem was no one was wearing blue pants. Meltdown number two was in full motion. I’m sure it was just a continuation but I don’t know how you explain meltdowns for two different reasons. Thankfully his dentist completely understood and helped me to distract him. She quickly checked his teeth, explained to me that they looked fine, and that he was probably feeling the moments since he is very sensitive to the feelings. We were in and out of the office in about twenty minutes, they even let us out the back door so we could go straight to our car. As soon as Owen sat back in his seat he was fine. I told him we could go see the train depot on the way home and he told me to turn the other way. He was fine when we got home and had a great rest of his night. The rules and routine are what he clings to. I tried to get him to breathe through it but he was so focused on everything that was wrong he couldn’t push past any of it until the chaos was gone. I try to work through it myself but I don’t always know what’s going to cause the meltdowns or when the rules will take over. Blue pants are a big thing for him right now but he’s been doing better about it, however, he was already to the meltdown so it continued when he couldn’t focus on blue pants. My heart aches that I can’t always help him through it and it is hard on me too because this is my baby and he’s crying. Plus, I don’t know if I should have brought him home or if it was wise to take him in. We go back in a couple of weeks for his regular checkup. I know that when we go again I will plan differently and pray that it helps him through the process. He was asleep in my arms and I cried. I pray for an answer, I pray for patience, and I pray for ways to explain it all to him and myself. I’m thankful for his laughter and how happy his robots made him today. Dance in the rain, smile during the sunset, and find joy in the little things. Smiles to all and donut daze!
Autism is as much about how I handle it as it is about Owen having it. I reminded myself of this as he yelled at me for doing exactly what he asked me to do but because he often says the opposite of what he means it’s hard to do exactly what he wants when it is not exactly what he wants. Our day thankfully didn’t start until almost six this morning. I was glad because I couldn’t fall asleep last night. Sure I fell asleep sitting straight up waiting for him to fall asleep but once it was really bedtime the clock moved forward fast and my emotions won. The last week has had a lot of positive moments but after being away the previous weekend it’s made it even harder on Owen. He asks me over and over what we are doing, where we are going, what people will be wearing, and screams at any mention of going anywhere besides where he wants to go. But today was church day and that makes my sweet baby O extremely happy. The only thing that made him a little sad was that one of his favorite people was not there today but he was still happy to be there. He wanted his chicken nuggets and cheeseburger so we picked them up on the way home. He was sitting at the table and got upset because the lid to the trashcan was slightly opened. Then he kept yelling because it would open on its own when he moved his hand a crossed it. I thought this would be a great idea to have an automatic trash can for him. At first, he paid no attention to it but now he is always looking at it. It’s gotten to the point that he will lift the lid up and then push it down. He then screams at it because it won’t stay down. At this point, it’s time for me to take the lid off so it doesn’t upset him anymore. It was a day full of meltdowns and wonderment. He never watches where he is going and he is constantly walking into something or knocking something over. As soon as he knocks something over he then immediately starts yelling and his feet beat against the ground. I try to calm him and let him know we can pick it up. He then starts screaming about picking it up. We then breathe. I have to remind him to breathe through all these moments. I went to the basement to get his Spider-Man outfit that he requested and that was exactly the second he needed me to help him with his tablet. He doesn’t like when I go down there, sometimes. As many screams as he had he also had accomplishments. He sang in numerous languages and he read with me. The robots filled a lot of our day but his greatest concern was that I don’t go to the bathroom, I sit so I’m not doing anything that surprises him, and I come to him immediately every time he says anything. Every time I walked to the bathroom he would stop what he was doing to tell me not to go and then come to the bathroom door to pull it shut and scream or knock on it from the outside, the door that he shut. We breathed. He wanted to watch a video that he hadn’t watched in over a year to fall asleep with but it only made him more hyper. He finally fell asleep in my arms after waking up numerous times. He made progress and he was mostly happy. For the rollercoaster ride today that was good. Care, love, and be kind. That is what I always remind Owen to do. Find your strength, keep moving forward, and know that tomorrow is a brand new day. Smiles to all and donut daze!
My eyes did not want to open when I heard Owen right before five. For a Saturday that was pretty good though. I told him he needed to go back to bed for a little bit and not to take his tablet. To my surprise off he ran. I could hear him get in bed and I think as soon as my eyes settled he was staring at me again. I tried one more time and same reaction. Off he ran. I’m not sure why I thought this would work any better but I got about five more minutes out of him once again. He had a couple of things on his mind, grandma and the “robot in the box come.” I told him he would be going to grandma’s but it would be a few hours and his robot would be here in a few days. I found a used one online and it should be here next week. The morning went pretty quickly and he was in a great mood. When it was time to go he surprisingly moved right through the process with me quickly. When I took him to see his grandma I decided to go to one of the stores near her that is like a thrift and antique store combined. I didn’t at first think about the robot but when I walked in the door I asked the man that worked there if he happened to know of any since it was a big store. He told me to check in one of the vendor areas and to my surprise, there were two. They had both colorways. I didn’t hesitate I got them both. I knew he would like the one better but once he likes something it is better to have a backup. I met a friend for coffee and then we spent some time exploring more of the shops. When I got to my mom’s I had planned on showing him the pink and purple one and then leaving it at my mom’s house. He was so happy to see it but he immediately asked for a “green robot” saying the color of the other one’s face. I told him I got one of those too but I had to go to the car to get it. I’m not sure why I didn’t give him both immediately. When I handed him the second one his face lit up and he was beyond thrilled. He ran around their house playing the songs. When we left there we brought both home. I’ll take the other one I get in the mail to her so he will have it to play with and we will have a spare. When we were getting ready to leave he said, “thank you it’s awesome I’m awesome.” There is no greater gift than to hear him say his words unprompted. Saying thank you isn’t something that always comes naturally to Owen so this was huge. And then for him to be quoting reviews and words from the robot was incredible. He was ready to go home saying, “take robot with you.” He always asks to take things home with him from grandma. I had picked up dinner before I got him and he ate every bit of it when we got home. He loves fried fish and sage dressing. He wanted the robots on the table with him but I told him he couldn’t have the robots until after he finished and washed his hands. I told him we didn’t want to get food on the robots since they have fabric ears. I put them on the chair next to him and to my surprise, he left them alone until he was done. He grabbed them before he went to wash his hands but I told him to stop so he could go to the bathroom. And again another surprise, he listened. He played with them the rest of the night. He was talking in French, listing to a video in Chinese on the tv, and occasionally stopped to ask for a video on his tablet saying, “walrus whistle” into the tablet. He kept yelling, “it’s awesome I’m awesome” and other wonderful words about himself and the robot. He asked me if he could have the box it came in several times but I distracted him since they didn’t have them. He wanted the robots to talk Chinese, French, and Russian. I told him they didn’t speak other languages but now I’m on the hunt to see if maybe they do. Always thankful when my boy is happy and today he was happy. He wanted to take the robots to bed but I told them they would be staying up and would be ready to play tomorrow. Pure joy is something we should all strive for. Find your happiness and sing the song of joy in your life. Smiles to all and donut daze!
“Patience patience patience,” Owen said. I always feel like I’m in a Brady Bunch moment the way he says it, repeating it three times, and mimicking my voice. He deleted an app on his tablet that he loves but because he likes to look at it from the beginning of the sequence he deletes it. It always takes me a minute to figure out what he is wanting me to do. When he was little I would explain that we needed to have patience with each other and I quickly learned that I would say it three times not even realizing it. Now, whenever I’m doing something he will try to take his tablet before I’m done and he immediately says, “patience patience patience.” I was able to get it back from him and load the app again. Then he couldn’t find his tablet that he had a second before. He started squealing and his foot was banging on the floor. “It’s over here,” he started yelling, his general words when he is looking for something. The lights were not on and that made it harder for him to see it on the floor but he also struggles with seeing something that is right in front of him and he has a hard time with directions to look for it. He woke after five and immediately let me know several things, one we weren’t going anywhere, and two the lights were not going to be on today. I had changed my nightgown to lounge pants and a t-shirt. This immediately sent Owen into overdrive because he was afraid we were going someplace so I started walking around my house, in the dark, praying the meltdowns stayed away. After a while, I changed back into my nightgown because he couldn’t handle it at all, asking me every few seconds if we were going anywhere, and I wanted him to remain calm. He at one point started telling me everything we have thrown away or everything he wanted to throw away in the last year or so. Bananas topped the list and then he said, “otter throw it in the trash bye bye otter” but took it to his room and hid it. He doesn’t like this toy at all but every time I try to get rid of it he hides it. Then he started looking in the trash for his “pop a ball break.” He wants the ball back and keeps looking for it. He said, “I feel sad.” I didn’t know what it was in reference to but he was watching a video about emotions so he may have been following what they were saying or it may have been his emotions about the ball breaking. We have an attic and basement. He kept telling me he wanted to go on the stairs to be like Spider-Man. The basement and the attic are not stairs he can really do alone so I have both doors where he can’t go on them but he is constantly trying to open the doors. I’ve had the basement door fixed numerous times trying to keep him from going on them but he keeps breaking the handle. He kept me very busy today but thankfully he was mostly sorta, kinda happy all day. When it was time for him to take a bath he got up from the table and made sure to push in the chairs. It felt like progress. He wanted to take everything to bed with him. He asked to wear his glasses to bed and take his glasses holder, from there the requests snowballed and I finally said nothing was going to bed with him. He will literally want to take everything he can see in front of him. His day was full of languages and requests. He was talking to Siri and doing voice requests on YouTube in Spanish and Arabic, plus he was singing or talking in numerous other languages throughout the day. We got his bath done and into the bed, he went. The fake snoring quickly turned silent and he was out. I’m thankful all the moments of sadness and struggles were put aside pretty quickly for both of us. His laughter got me through a lot of our day. Be the change you want to see in the world. Tomorrow is your day. Smiles to all and donut daze!
Owen slept until six in the morning. I had to look at the clock several times to make sure. I woke at first around three in the morning, listening for him, and knowing that no matter how much my bladder said I needed to get up I was staying right where I was. Thankfully I went back to sleep. I truly could not believe he slept that late but I was thankful. When he got up I could hear him get his tablet and he came straight to me. I asked him if he had gone to the bathroom yet, knowing he had not. He said, “no bathroom today” and I said, “then no tablet today.” Off he ran, saying “tablet” as the word trailed towards me. He then requested cereal, chocolate milk, and waffles. After it all sat there for about an hour he finally ate his breakfast and within a few minutes, he asked me for pancakes. Some days it seems like he eats all day long. Today was one of those days. He knew it was therapy day and couldn’t wait to go. He was only seeing two of his therapists since one of them was on vacation and they called to see if we would like to come in earlier so we left right after lunch to go. All week he had been talking about this robot but I wasn’t sure what it was. He would mention his therapist’s name and then say, “see the robot.” I was going to ask her but when she brought Owen back to me she said she wanted to show me the robot he liked. She was excited about how interested he was in it and I told her he couldn’t wait to come see it. He wanted to get chicken nuggets and a cheeseburger on the way home so two breakfast and now two lunch. Maybe technically more since he had several different things at each breakfast and lunch. When I got home I started looking for the robot. I am in the process of getting him one but I showed him the video of the robot on YouTube. He was thrilled and watched it the rest of the night. He kept running to me saying, “robot box coming mommy.” Then he would run to the front door and say, “it here” and wanted me to come to the door. I tried to explain to him it will take several days to get here but he doesn’t really understand time. He was happy to be watching it on the videos though. I think the eating train finally slowed for dinner and he only ate part of it. I have been changing his bedtime each night ever so slightly. It’s been hard for him to adjust when I was trying to do it thirty minutes at a time so now I’m doing it in five-minute increments each night. Seems to be working and hopefully it will keep him sleeping later as well. He fell asleep quickly once again and I think I fell asleep about the same time. He asked me multiple times what we were doing tomorrow and he wanted to make sure we weren’t going anywhere. I wondered if he thought we are going on a trip again. He was in a great mood all day and hopefully, I can get his robot soon and he will be even happier. Live your dreams out loud. Smiles to all and donut daze!
It’s happy dance day. Owen slept until about five in the morning. He even knew he was going to see his grandma today and he slept all night. I can’t wait until September when we go to the new autism specialists. I’m hoping they will be able to guide us with his sleep and behaviors. Owen’s body responds so differently to things like I do so I’m hoping they will be able to do more analysis and see what he reacts to. The clinic is about three hours away so it will be a whirlwind trip there and back in one day. This is one of the reasons I am trying to get him used to more car rides. He doesn’t always do well with car rides but highway driving is generally better than the stop-and-go in the city. He was pretty calm all morning until it came to his socks. He never wants to put them on himself. He starts screaming that he “needs help” and I insist that he is amazing and doesn’t need my help. Today I told him if he didn’t do it then he wouldn’t be able to go. There are some things I know he can’t do like button his paints but he is learning, however, I know he can do his socks and shoes. I still help him with both but he can mostly do his socks. The problem is he doesn’t always realize to put the bottom of the socks on the bottom of his sole. Then when it comes to the shoe I have to remind him to hold the tongue up so it doesn’t go inside his shoe but I am amazed at how far he has come. He had a great day at grandma’s house and when we came home it seems like all he wanted was snacks the minute we walked in the door. When I was listing things he could have for dinner he decided he would add to my list and asked for waffles. I figure since he added to the list and said, “please” he would get waffles. When they were cooking he started asking about his Spider-Man costume. He said, “Spider-Man hat” and immediately started looking. I was surprised he wanted the hood over his face again but he loved it. He then wanted the costume on too. He was very patient about putting his fingers in all the slots and wore it for at least twenty minutes. He even took it off himself which I wasn’t sure if he could do because the zipper is hidden mostly. The rest of the night went quickly with me slowly trying to adjust his bedtime a little later. It’s hard keeping him up when he is ready for sleep. I’m thankful he fell asleep quickly and he knew tomorrow is “therapy therapy” day. I’m thankful for his smile. Find your strength and know that you are important. Smiles to all and donut daze!
I am trying to block out exactly the time that Owen got up but I know I kept asking him to go back to bed since about one in the morning. My childhood self can only relate to having so much energy after being up that long. I’m so passed exhausted my sheep are counting humans. I’m going to try to keep him up later tonight but that is not always easy. He starts requesting his blanket by about seven and anywhere from eight to nine it seems like he is out. I’ve also found that even when I do attempt to keep him up it doesn’t prevent him from waking up in the middle of the night. His body wakes up on its own schedule and that’s that. I can say the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree and I never slept as a child, never. With him being up so early he didn’t want any of the lights on and this caused a huge meltdown because I wanted the light on in my room. I never imagined all the moments I would have to navigate by five o’clock in the morning on a daily basis. He was stuck on blue pants again this morning. Every video that he watched and the character was not wearing blue pants set him in motion. He would come running to me saying, “he’s got blue pants” and because most of the time he says the opposite of what someone is doing or wearing I knew they were not in blue pants before he even came to me. I try to explain that he needs to say the real color or ask for something he wants but that doesn’t always happen and he doesn’t understand. He came to me and put his tablet in front of me. He said, “Curious George pedal pushers man jump in the water.” He was requesting me to say the words for a YouTube search. I found it interesting since pedal pushers are what my mom wears a lot but because Owen only wants everyone to wear blue pants she hasn’t been wearing them around him since he had the huge meltdown. I pray in September when we go to the autism specialist they will be able to help us with more answers. He didn’t want to go anywhere today but we have a very full week ahead so I was fine with staying home and we got no sleep. I hope he sleeps tonight. His belly had to be full after all the fish he ate tonight so hopefully that will help him sleep. He read a lot again tonight and I was happy about that. His smile kept me going on a very rocky day. I keep reminding myself that when all else fails succeed at something else. Some days feel overwhelming but know that tomorrow can be anything you want it to be. Smiles to all and donut daze!
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AuthorI'm Lynn Browder. Owen's Mommy. The best moments in time are when I get to see the smile on his face and that giggle come from his heart. Archives
February 2025
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